Of Sex and Chocolate
Chapter 4a Susan
After I awoke the next morning and my dream doctor had plowed my fertile, carnal spread, I took a shower, got dressed and ran to the kitchen. Now was the moment of truth. I reached into the fridge and pulled out a cool Healthy Target strawberry milkshake, popped it open and hopefully sipped. It was amazing! It tasted better than any sinfully rich milkshake I had ever had. I was hoping this good omen meant that this week would be a piece of cake (an unfortunate metaphor I realize, but it made me laugh).
After grabbing my reports and my notes I proceeded to the meeting I was dreading. When I got there, I was greeted by my boss Cheryl Rogers and her boss Felix Schaefer. Then some representatives from our customer, Leyrex. They included the researcher and a man who called himself Carlton Massey, the director of Research and Development. While I didn’t ever recall meeting him, he seemed familiar.
As the meeting progressed, it became quite clear that Cheryl and Felix had sold me out. They indicated that my background in the field of study, was often useful, but occasionally colored my analysis. I wasn’t surprised about Felix, because he never met a scurrying woodland rodent that he couldn’t relate to, but Cheryl’s betrayal surprised me, as she had always treated me like a friend.
After Steve Halprin, the researcher, had tried to cover his literally small, but metaphorically huge ass, by questioning my methods and my conclusions; I pulled out my report, which disputed his findings and shredded his cover, leaving said ass exposed. I looked over at Carlton Massey and he just smiled and nodded. When the meeting was over, my boss and her boss told me that they believed in me all along; despite their effort to play “Bad cop/Bad cop.” Then they scurried off, no doubt to mate and increase the weasel population of North America. After they had left, Mr. Massey then beckoned me to talk to him in the corner.
“I just wanted to say how impressed I was with how methodical your report was and how composed you were.”
“Thanks, but it is my job to ensure that you don’t bring something to market before it is ready,” I smiled somewhat seriously, but somewhat smugly.
“Are you the same Susan D’Amore that was a junior researcher at Pfizer?”
“Yes” I smiled as I remembered where I had known him from. He was the head of a project team that my old boss was working under when I was at Pfizer.”
“I remember hearing good things about you from Larry Reynolds” he said referring to my old boss. “Honestly Susan, what are you doing here, working in this capacity? You should be back in pharmaceuticals where you can put your biochem PHD to use, not outsourced testing of herbal remedies.”
“It’s a long story, but let’s just say I was out of the field for a while,” I said.
He smiled and pulled out a business card and handed it to me. “We are looking to expand our pharmaceutical division in a few months and I’m looking for good people. Send me your résumé.”
I looked a little dubious.
“Susan, we both know that you don’t belong here. Send me your resume and we’ll talk in a couple of months.”
I nodded and thanked him profusely. After he left, I let out a somewhat reserved scream of triumph.
The rest of my week just flew. Aside from everything I had been doing, I started walking around the building with Bev after we had finished eating lunch (as she had been trying to get me to do for months). A couple of days, I even replaced two meals a day with the shakes (mmmm… strawberry!). By the morning of my appointment with Aaron, I had lost fifteen pounds for the week!
I had a little bounce in my step as I got out of the elevator and walked to Aaron’s office. As per our routine, I saw Jana walk out of the office and handed her credit card to Toni. She did not appear happy.
“Hi Jana,” I smiled.
“Hi Susan,” she responded with less enthusiasm.
I looked at her earnestly. “The boy?”
“Yeah,” She whimpered.
“Honey, trust me. For a woman as lovely as you, there are plenty of handsome, bright men who’d be dying to go out with you.”
“But this one was special,” she said.
“Apparently special enough to make you look the way you do, though, I’m not too fond of him at the moment” I jabbed.
Jana then had a thoughtful look in her eyes. “Susan, I know that we’ve only just met, but you seem so kind and smart. I’d love to talk to you sometime. Could I have your number or could I give you mine…”
I don’t know why, but I felt this weird connection to Jana. Maybe it was because in some ways, she reminded me of myself. “Of course honey, give me your phone,” I interrupted and entered my name and number in her phone when she gave it to me.
Then I waved goodbye and entered the office for my fourth appointment.
Chapter 4b Aaron
After the last session I just had, I was looking forward to seeing Susan’s happy face more than ever. Jana just had a fairly big setback. While I was quite happy when she told me that she had a date last week, part of me was apprehensive. As it would turn out, I should have been. Apparently the date had gone very well at first. According to Jana, they had an amazing chemistry. Then, the perceived end of the date came, and that was where things started to get awkward. The boy became sexually aggressive and when Jana asked him to stop, he caked on a guilt trip with the density of concrete. His parting shot to her was that she had to “stop acting like a little girl” and this was the twenty first century and if she wanted to get a guy she would need to “do what was expected”.
I had spent the last hour trying to undo years of misplaced guilt, which had been dredged up again by some asshole punk on the make. Despite the use of all “three C’s”, I was barely able to put a dent in it. I realized that I needed more time, so I asked her to make an appointment with Toni for tomorrow at five (I always leave the last hour of the day on Wednesdays and Fridays unscheduled for emergencies, and this qualified as such). When she told me that her insurance would only cover one appointment a week, my “first C” told her that the appointment was on me. While she seemed grateful, I could still see that haunted look that I thought I had eradicated a couple of months ago. I was tempted to ask Jana for the guy’s address so I could go to his house and kick the shit out of him, but “C’s two and three” reminded me that it would not be a good idea, before excusing themselves when Susan knocked.
“Come in,” I smiled in anticipation of seeing this amazing person who had turned my life upside down.
When Susan entered, I could tell that she had lost another significant chunk of weight. Her belly did not seem quite as big and her face looked less puffy. Her arms even seemed a little thinner. Her body was beginning to look as lovely her beautiful soul.
“I lost another fifteen pounds!” she exclaimed, as it almost looked like she wanted to hug me.
While I was happy, I was a little concerned at how quickly the weight loss was happening. “Wow, Susan that’s makes 33 pounds in two weeks. Are you sure you are feeling OK? I’m a little concerned that this is happening too fast.”
“I feel wonderful!” she chirped.
She then went on to explain how she had begun walking with my other patient Beverly Shore at lunch (in addition to sometimes replacing another meal with a shake). I was amazed! I had not given Susan any instructions to exercise, but it appeared that her mind had completely bought into the idea of losing weight on her own. Then it hit me. “If Susan was capable of doing this without my help, then she could be out of my life and I wouldn’t have to deal with her distracting presence, the analyst in me reasoned. Then the lovesick puppy in me reminded the analyst that I would be able to pursue a relationship with her at that time. I was thrown back into turmoil.
“Well I’m happy you are making such progress, but we have to be careful. I need you to know that these first couple of weeks you have been shedding mostly ‘water weight.’ You should see a great downturn in lost pounds going forward. You can’t worry about the numbers. Just continue with what you’re doing and if you start feeling off, please contact me immediately.”
“Of course Aaron. I just want you to know that I am driven to lose this weight. I need to lose it!” she said with an intensity I had not seen in her up to this point.
I was tempted to ask “why”, but that look contained the answer that I was afraid of, but longed for. Instead, I responded as calmly as my pounding heart allowed. “It will happen, Susan. I know you can do it!” I said happily.
After we spent a few minutes clarifying what this week’s objectives were, I put her under to place these new commands. While it seemed that she was OK with walking, I was worried that she needed more supervision with her exercise program. She told me that she could afford a gym membership, so I asked her to join a gym and to work with a trainer. She somewhat balked at the idea of the trainer, but in the end I convinced her. That was the first command I hypnotically reinforce. The second command might have meant her taking a step back. I was worried that replacing two meals with a shake was not healthy, so my suggestion was that she would only have the urge to replace one meal a day with a shake. The last command was for her to take a daily vitamin. Under hypnosis, she said that she took vitamins, but admitted that she usually forgot, in her morning rush.
Before I woke her I had her open her eyes. God, they’re beautiful, I thought and the sexy hypnotic look began to turn me on. Part of me wanted to keep her in a trance and ask her about her feelings for me, and I almost did. Then, surprisingly it was my “first C” which deterred me from doing so. I cared for Susan. I would have to trust my instincts that she loved me. At that moment, I knew. I was going to pursue a relationship with Susan when this was all over. While she had broken the 200 pound barrier, I didn’t care how much she ended up weighing. I knew how I felt. When she was done with me the therapist, she would be stuck with me as her lover.
Chapter 4C Susan
I blinked and opened my eyes. I saw Aaron looking at me intently. While his eyes were still kind, they also possessed a familiar look. He had the look that I had only seen in my fantasies, but nevertheless, was unmistakable. I felt myself getting wet, which apparently was offsetting the dryness in my throat. We continued to look at each other for a few moments. There was no awkwardness. It was if we knew what each other wanted. I needed to tell him, but somehow he already knew.
“Aaron, I…”
“Susan, we have to get something straight. As long as I am your therapist that is all I can be” he interrupted.
I didn’t know what to say. I just felt like ice water had been splashed on my face. Then I felt the warmth flood back into me. First of all, his eyes hadn’t changed. They continued to look at me the way that they had since I came out of the trance. Then I thought about his words. “As long as I am your therapist…” He wasn’t telling me that we could never be together; just not now. My face must have been a sight, as my countenance’s display went from abject misery, to the dopiest grin in a matter of seconds.
As we parted company with our customary handshake, both of us held on much longer than necessary; both of us reluctant to let go. Then he smiled at me and we both let go together.
“See you next week?” he beamed.
“I can’t wait!” I exclaimed.
“Neither can I” as his eyes contained the hungry look from my fantasies.
I walked out of the office with my dopey grin still intact and a little extra bounce in my step. When I got to the waiting room, I was surprised at who was waiting there.
“Jana, are you waiting for me?” I asked as she nodded back nervously.
“I know this is last minute, but can I buy you dinner?”
The look of pathos in her eyes was in direct contrast to my dopey grin. It appeared that Jana wanted to be my friend. As I had a shortage of friends since my divorce (as my prenup contained no special clause that Richard and my friends would continue to like me after he and I broke up), I was happy to add her to my list which contained both Bev and my college roommate.
We went to a chic restaurant. It was “chic” as in overpriced and with a snotty wait-staff. I ordered a garden salad with a non-fat vinaigrette dressing (I’d swear, I’ve had better salads at McDonald’s). Taking my cue, Jana ordered the same. As it took a good twenty minutes to prepare our dinners, it gave Jana and me plenty of time to talk.
She explained what she had told Aaron about her date, but also a few facts which for some reason she didn’t feel comfortable talking to him about. Apparently the date started as a double date with Dan and his brother Peter (or Petey, as his brother called him) and his date Britney. Later, they had split up. From my short time of knowing Jana, I was able to interpret what she said. When she referred to Britney as quiet, except when she laughed in an interesting manner, I interpreted that to mean “brainless bimbo.” Then she said something that concerned me.
“I know this sounds silly, but there was something about Peter which worried me.”
“How so?” I asked.
“I got the feeling that he wasn’t a nice guy.”
“Did he say something?”
“No, but he was looking at me in a weird way. Almost like I was his date and not Dan’s.”
“Honey, from what you’ve told me, you are better off without Dan and his creepy brother” I preached.
“I know… its just that Dan is so…”
“Cute?” I interrupted.
“Yeah” admitted Jana sheepishly.
“Jana, take it from me, there are more important things for a boy to be than cute. Believe it or not, at one time I kind of looked like a blond version of you”
“I believe it. You’re quite pretty” said Jana.
“Thanks for being so kind. I’m not quite where I want to be yet. I know I’ll never be that girl again, but I’m aiming to get close.”
“Well I’m not just being nice.”
“You are sweet,” I paused before continuing. “Anyway, I know what guys are after. While I did most of my dating in the last century, we girls observed the three date rule. No sex before at least the third date. Most guys understood this. The also knew that girls that didn’t observe this rule were usually sluts. And you dear Jana are definitely not a slut,” I smiled and Jana laughed.
“I’m glad to hear I’m not a slut!” she tried to say as she laughed before getting serious again. “I’m not sure I’ll be ready after three dates. Would that make me a prude?”
“No sweetie. I sense that you are a special exception to the ‘three date rule’. Any guy that wants to be with you is going to have to accept that. And trust me, they’ll be worth the wait.”
“Don’t you mean I’ll be worth the wait?”
“Oh my! You do have an ego after all!” I grinned as she laughed. “No, I mean if they’re willing to wait for you, then they’ll have proven that they care enough for you to wait. That is the kind of guy you should be waiting for.”
Jana smiled. I could tell that she was feeling better about herself. I was smiling too. I’ve made a new friend who was willing to confide in me.
After we had consumed our four leaves of romaine, two of butter and three of iceberg, we decided to part company. Jana then offered to pick up the check, but I refused and did so (after all I still have plenty of money from my settlement). Then we went our separate ways with the promise to keep in touch.
That night I was sitting on top of the world. My professional prospects were on the rise, I made a new friend and I knew I had a shot with Aaron, once I shed another sixty pounds. I was just about a third there, so I gave myself my marching orders. Get there! That night I made love to my dream Aaron. Now I could clearly see the hunger in his eyes, as he lovingly, but passionately drove his cock into me. In the afterglow, I remembered what I though about Aaron when I first met him. He wasn’t looking at 222 pounds of gelatinous flesh. He was looking at the real me and he made me feel lovely. That is how I knew that my Aaron really loved me. For his sake, we would need to wait. Also, I wanted to get as close to that 115 pound vixen as I could. He deserved it.
Chapter 4d Aaron
Susan looked amazing today. I couldn’t help but notice how her lovely features were beginning to escape the reduced puffiness of her face. More importantly, I was ecstatic that I was able to convey my real feelings to her. Still, while I was glad that I didn’t completely toss my professional ethics out the window, I was way over the line. This should not be happening, but I had resigned myself to my fate. Part of me did feel a sense of relief. I no longer worried about my feelings for Susan. I had them, they were real and they were not going away. More importantly she knew how I felt and I could tell that she returned my feelings. She understood the professional tap dance I was doing so we both knew where we stood.
As I lay in bed, I was wondering if she was having the same thoughts of me, as I stroked in and out of the imaginary beauty that would be Susan. Her eyes shone with that loving innocence, as she professed her undying love for me. Her beautiful breasts mashed up against my chest as our hungry mouths found each other. I had fantasized before, but it was always about lust. Susan was the first woman that caused me to make love to my fantasy.
It had been so long since I’d been in love. I guess I could wait a few more months before I got the real thing. While I always strove to help my patients for their sake; now I had a personal stake in getting Susan to where she wanted to be. The sooner that happened, the sooner she would be mine. I was desperately hoping that I had the intestinal fortitude to balance my desires with her needs. For this to work, I needed to be her therapist first, so I could not let her down.