WANTED...’FEMALE’
Chapter 2
Annie sat in a comfortable deep leather lounge chair in the artistically decorated lounge room of a rather unusually arranged apartment. It seemed there was the lounge room and the kitchen and that was all.
Everything else she could see seemed to be covered with easels and paintings and long draping sheets. Annie figured there must be a door to a bedroom or studio somewhere, but for the life of her, she couldn’t see one. The walls were almost fully draped with paint-spattered white or grey sheets that reached full-length to the floor, and then some.
Annie had been five minutes early and hadn’t had any trouble finding the place. The Loxton Apartments were situated in the upmarket side of town where she had always seen herself as living one day, after she became a rich and famous model. He had met her at the door with a smile in his eyes that had put her on the defensive from the word go-not that he intimidated her. It was just that he seemed to know he had some kind of an edge over her. The twinkle in his eyes told her so.
Annie hadn’t decided to attend the interview until almost the last minute. After hanging up the phone she had made herself another cup of coffee and had then cooked her breakfast-lunch early, not knowing ‘how’ her day was going to turn out after such a rocky beginning.
She had steamed and fumed for a while as she’d eaten her way through the bacon and eggs, choosing to feel insulted and indignant for most of the time. But by the time she had finished and cleaned the dishes she’d begun to wonder more and more about the difference between a woman and a female.
She’d looked up both words in her dictionary, but the definitions of each had been basically the same. Several times up until she’d actually left her apartment Annie had decided to meet him and then ‘not’ meet him.
Then finally she’d committed to the interview in her mind, if, for no other reason than to find out just what the difference between a woman and female actually was.
The man sitting opposite her sipping his coffee appeared to be aged around his early forties. In Annie’s mind he was attractive, but in his own way. She didn’t think his looks would appeal to ‘all’ women, but they would to some.
She wasn’t one of them, although she liked his eyes, even though they still told her he would always have the upper hand with her, somehow. He wore a simple cotton shirt to suit the early summer season. His long loose slacks matched the colour of the shirt. The almost Mexican style moustache suited his face and his short, but not close-cropped brown hair. He was taller than she was, and of a lithe build.
After he had met her at the door he had shown her into the chair in which she now sat, while he’d made them each a coffee. Now, she also sat sipping her coffee in a comfortable silence while she took in the room and its contents... and him, feeling also he was doing the same with her. It was certainly a strange way to begin an interview for a job; Annie mused, as she silently complimented him on the coffee.
So far, not one single word had been spoken by either of them. When he had opened the door to meet her, he had just stood back with a quiet smile and gestured her inside and towards the chair. Then he had disappeared into the kitchen.
He’d returned within three minutes or so and handed her the steaming cup, then had sat to begin sipping his own. Occasionally their eyes would meet and she’d smile, but no sound had yet to pass through either of their lips.
“Are you fully awake now?” He asked unexpectedly out of the blue while she was halfway through swallowing a mouthful of coffee. Her instantly blazing gaze locked immediately into his, but was at once defeated by the twinkle in his eyes. He raised his cup to his lips while waiting for her answer, which took at least thirty seconds to arrive.
“You must have read the book.” Annie stated flatly as the best she could do at such short notice.
“Book?” He queried.
“How to make friends and influence people.” Annie replied, watching his eyes sparkle and his lips smile. But he said nothing further. Then:
“What’s your name?” He asked her, again while she was halfway through a mouthful of coffee. She swallowed quickly to answer, not really knowing why she felt she had to answer him promptly.
“Annie Summers.” She smiled.
“Mike Jones.” He returned, his eyes smiling, his lips not.
“What questions do you have that I haven’t already answered on the phone?” He asked her as she finished her last mouthful of coffee and was placing the cup down on the small table between them. Annie wondered if he was deliberately doing that, asking her questions knowing she was always just about to swallow. Her mind raced for questions.
She still couldn’t see herself posing in the nude. She had always steadfastly refused work that involved any sort of nudity, all of her modeling life. She had lost many well-paying jobs because of it, but had always stood firm, even though it had meant almost being destitute at times. She’d set that value at the beginning of her career and had never wavered. She felt pride in that alone.
“What’s difference?” She asked, knowing that the answer to that question was most probably the only reason she had come, since she had no intention of breaking her no-nude policy for him or any other would-be Leonardo Divinci. She had watched Mike Jones’ eyes sparkle as she’d spoken and had found it interesting. He sat there finishing his coffee while his gaze dropped to the carpet for a few seconds.
When he looked up at her again, his eyes were once again sparkling. Annie felt then that whatever passed through his lips next she was going to lose. She didn’t know why. She just did.
“Why is there air?” He finally said quietly, the sparkle remaining in his eyes, but his face becoming instantly serious, as if he’d asked her a question from the television show, ‘Who wants to be a millionaire?’
Annie suppressed an immediate impulse to say thanks, but no thanks, then get up and walk, leaving him to play his mind games with the next unfortunate woman who attended his interview.
“I need it to stay alive and be healthy, happy and wise.” She came back with a challenging grin and her jaw set in a winner’s mode. She noted his eyes sparkling as she’d answered.
“There you go then.” Was all he said, his eyes still sparkling and his lips joining them in a smile that told her he’d won, somehow. Annie was none the wiser.
“That’s it?” She said, feeling a little tired of it all and also a little frustrated in feeling as if she was losing each and every round. “That’s the difference? I drive all the way over here and ‘that’s’ all you can tell me?”
“I thought you came to see about a job as an artist’s model?” He replied, his eyes still smiling. “Even though it still might be a bit early in the morning for you.”
He was pushing her buttons, one by bloody one, Annie knew, and, he was doing it deliberately. She was sure of it.
“I don’t ‘do’ nude work.” She stated flatly. “I never have, and, I never will.”
“That’s ‘your’ problem.” He answered, his eyes still sparkling. “Why did you come then?”
“To find out the difference between a woman and a female.” Annie replied shortly, tensing her thigh muscles as she prepared to stand up and leave him to get on with his own strange life and times. “If there really ‘is’ one, which I doubt.”
“I’ve already told you.” He answered. “What do you want?... a fax?”
She watched his eyes flash and sparkle and knew he was enjoying something she was definitely not. It was as if he was challenging her at every turn, and defeating her at every turn.
“Air?” She said a little angrily and not caring. “Air? ‘That’s’ the difference between a woman and a female? Air?”
“Only if it’s in your head.” He said dryly, his eyes seeming to flash and sparkle like the Aurora Borealis.
That was it. Annie stood up angrily. She hadn’t traveled there to be called an air- head by an obvious fruit-loop calling himself an easel or a bloody artist.
“The ‘need’ for it ‘is’ the difference.” He said as he looked up at her. He’d made no move to rise when she did. His eyes still danced. “And ‘patience’ definitely does ‘not’ seem to be one of your strongest virtues, does it?”
Annie’s temper bristled just below her conscious mind like the Loch Ness Monster getting ready to surface and shock the world. Her own professionalism was the only thing that stood now between being civil and getting right down and very dirty. Her jaw tensed and her teeth gritted as she drew breath for what to her would be the final showdown, and this time... she ‘would’ win!
“It doesn’t matter who says the words.” He said suddenly, cutting her off with a lungful of hot air and words and nowhere to go with them. “It doesn’t matter the size or origin of the words, or if you even ‘like’ the person ‘saying’ the words.”
Annie was forced to allow the large breath to slowly leave her mouth in a controlled manner. It was either that or pass out from holding her breath for too long.
“What’s ‘really’ important.” He went on. “Is whether the ‘intent’ of the words hold any meaning for you, your life, or your happiness. And, ‘you’ can always act, ‘now’.”
The breath was gone. She drew another, not as large, not as quickly, and not as hot. He’d won again, she decided, feeling like he’d stolen her thunder.
“’You’ can always act ‘now’, by believing you’ve already arrived. Because your dreams are worthless, your plans are dust, and your goals are impossible.”
He continued. He hadn’t cut her off. She’d had nothing to say. She just stood there gazing down at him while he looked up at her and continued speaking. His eyes were no longer sparkling. His face was deadly serious.
“All of them are of no value to you unless they’re followed by committed action to act ‘now’.” She listened to him say.
“There has never been a map, however carefully executed to detail and scale, which has ever carried its owner over one inch of ground.” He said to her, as she felt rooted to the spot, not knowing whether to leave or stay, and not really wanting to do either.
“There has never been a law, however fair, which has prevented one single crime.” She felt suddenly heavy on her own feet and wanted to sit, but she didn’t.
“There has never been a book written, however wise, which has achieved one single dream.” Annie listened, but didn’t know why.
“Action ‘alone’ is the spark, which ignites the map, the law, the book, your plans, and your goals into a living ‘force’. ‘Action’ is the ‘only’ food and drink which nourishes your success. And ‘you’ can always act, ‘now’.”
Annie felt leaden. His words held her captured and she didn’t know why. She wanted to leave, but she wanted to stay. She wanted to sit, but she didn’t want to commit to remaining. She didn’t know ‘what’ she wanted, and she knew that, too. So she just stood there gazing down at him while his serious face looked back up at her in her inward confusion, feeling somehow that he knew just how confused she really was.
“Your procrastination that has always held you back was born of fear.” He said next. “And now you can recognize the secret which has been mined from the depths of all courageous hearts, that to conquer fear you must always ‘act’ without hesitation. Then the flutters of your heart will vanish. Because ‘you’ can always act, ‘now’.”
Annie wanted to vanish. She wanted to be anywhere right then, but where she was. But she didn’t vanish and she really didn’t want to. She knew that. She also knew that somehow ‘he’ knew that, too. Her entire focus seemed to be becoming his eyes. They no longer sparkled, yet in his face there was a fullness she had never seen before in a man-any man. So she stayed a little longer to listen.
“From now on you can always remember the lesson of the firefly.” He said, as she pictured instantly a dark night with bright flies buzzing all around, glowing in the dark. “Who gives off its light, only when it’s on the wing, only when it’s in ‘action’. ‘You’ can become a firefly, too, and even in the daytime your glow will be seen in spite of the sun.”
Her mind tried to picture how bright that must have to be to be seen during the day.
“Let others be butterflies who preen their wings, but depend on the charity of a flower for life. You can ‘be’ a firefly, and ‘your’ light will brighten your world and the worlds of those around you.”
Annie’s mind and imagination seemed full of happy and excited fireflies buzzing around in the day and night, all having fun, and one single lonely butterfly, preening itself on a single lonely leaf in the morning sun. She was having less and less original thoughts of her own. She knew that, but seemed content to just let him keep talking about fireflies and butterflies and see where it led.
She felt calm and relaxed. Limp and loose. All her previous tension and anger was now no longer noticed-now no longer there. Her body began to feel less and less heavy and began to feel more comfortable, but she didn’t notice. She just listened.
“’You’ don’t have to avoid anything that ‘feels’ right today.” He went on. “With no injustice intended towards another ‘you’ know, really, that tomorrow never comes, and if it does... you’ve missed the boat of your ‘real’ life.”
Annie’s inner vision filled then with images of herself standing alone on a dock, watching pathetically as a huge luxury ocean liner sailed off out to sea with all the people on all the decks waving excitedly down at her. In her imagination of that lonely vision Annie wasn’t waving back. She felt sad, lonely, and alone.
“’You’ can act ‘now’, even though your actions may not bring you happiness today.” He continued, seemingly unstoppable. “Because it’s better to act ‘now’ than to ‘not’ act and flounder. Happiness, in truth, may not be the fruit of your own life plucked by your action today, but ‘without’ action, your life’s fruit will die on the vine, unless you act, ‘now’.”
Annie’s mind filled with images of catwalks and fame, of riches and glory, and of an unidentifiable man holding a baby. All of them were somehow hung on a long vine that represented her future time line-all of them within her reach, yet just out of it-all of them seeming to wither and die before her very eyes. She felt like crying, but she didn’t. She listened instead.
“’You’ can act, ‘now’.” He told her firmly, inspiringly, sincerely. “’’You’ can act, ‘now’. From this moment onwards you can repeat these words again and again and again, each hour, each day, every day, until the words become as much a habit as your gentle, relaxed breathing.”
Annie noticed her breathing. It was relaxed and calm. She felt the same way.
“The actions which will follow will become as instinctive as the blinking of your own eyes.” He said and she blinked. She knew she blinked, and she noticed that.
“With these words, ‘you’ can condition those parts of your ‘female’ mind that you ‘really’ are, to ‘act’ with the power of ‘One’, and then find you can perform ‘any’ act and ‘every’ act necessary for your success and happiness!”
Annie felt her emotions rising within her as he spoke the words he had, as if she was standing on an Olympic dais, waiting for the medal of her own successful and happy life to be hung around her neck in personal pride. She was slowly, gradually being swept away and she knew it.
“With ‘these’ words.” He continued. “’You’ can condition your ‘female’ mind to ‘act’ as the ‘real’ you, ‘who’ you really are, as you were born and as you were born to be, to meet ‘every’ challenge for your true happiness and success, which the ‘woman’ in you will try to avoid. ‘You’ can ‘always’... act ‘now’!”
Annie felt desperately like doing something, anything, but she didn’t know what. She felt motivated, inspired, challenged, but she didn’t know what she felt motivated, inspired, or challenged to do, except to just stand there and listen. So she did. And that’s all she did.
“’You’ can act ‘now’.” He told her. “And ‘you’ can ‘repeat’ these words again and again and again when you wake each day with your soft hands between your warm legs.”
Her vision filled with that thought instantly. She always woke up that way, but she took it nowhere. She had always had more ‘important’ things to do. She couldn’t remember ‘what’ exactly they’d ‘been’ right then, but she knew they were always there, preventing her from enjoying that special wonderful feeling of her warm hands on her breasts and between her legs, and allowing that unique feeling to take her wherever it wanted to.
“’You’ can awake each day as a ‘female’ and ‘leap’ from your bed.” He said. “While the ‘woman’ of your world wants to sleep for another hour. And when you enter the hectic and busy daily world of your woman you can say these words to your ‘female’ and immediately confront your first challenge, your first fear, or your first obstacle, while the ‘woman’ of your world thinks only about the possibility of defeat.”
Annie’s mind filled with a vision of lazy fat women, all hesitating in whatever they were doing, while ‘she’ strode confidently forward into her day, especially towards those who would never pay her or would never pay her on time. She began to feel all-powerful, proud and strong within herself, and did not fail to notice that she had never felt that way before in her entire life.
“’You’ can act ‘now!” He repeated. “Whenever you face a closed door to your wishes or desires, even towards yourself, and say these words to yourself and knock on the door of that ‘female’ wish, or that ‘female’ desire, while the ‘woman’ of your world waits outside ‘her’ door with fear and trepidation.”
Annie then saw herself confidently striding past a long line of women waiting at a door. She walked straight through it as if it didn’t exist, self-assuredness oozing from her every pore, personal pride filling her springed steps forward, always forward, while she noticed the looks of surprise and anger on the faces of they whom she passed so easily, so effortlessly.
“’You’ can act ‘now!’” He repeated. “Whenever you face a temptation that your ‘woman’ wants, but your ‘female’ doesn’t ‘feel’ right about, and immediately remove yourself from that temptation!”
Annie saw herself wanting things, unimportant things that she now saw clearly she had only ever wanted, but had never really needed and she felt sad and determined at the same time not to allow the two to ever become confused in her life again.
“’You’ can act ‘now!’” He said again. “Whenever your ‘woman’ is tempted to quit and begin again tomorrow, your ‘female’ will say these words to herself and immediately ‘act’ to consume another victory!”
Annie knew she had always been a hard worker, but she had also always been a quitter when the going had ever became tough. But she knew also that in the future that was ‘not’ how it was going to be. She ‘felt’ it deeply within her, somewhere.
“’You’ will act ‘now’!” He told her firmly. “Because only instinctive ‘feel-right’ action on the part of your ‘female’ determines your value to yourself and to those who really count towards your life and real happiness-the natural ‘males’—not the ‘men’, but the ‘males’!”
Annie began to wonder what the difference was between a man and a male, but he continued to talk to her, firmly, sincerely, and very clearly. Each and every word he said seemed to form an instant picture in her mind and attach itself to a natural-felt feeling inside her heart and soul.
“’You’ will act ‘now’!” He said again. “And know that to multiply your value you will multiply the actions of your ‘female’. Then you can walk where the ‘woman’ of your world fears to walk. Then you can work when the ‘woman’ of your world wants to rest. Then you can talk when the ‘woman’ of your world remains silent. And you can ‘act’ on ten ideas or impulses of your natural ‘female’ nature, which will lead to success and personal happiness, while the ‘woman’ of your world makes her grand plans to think about starting one! And so, who you ‘really’ are, a natural ‘female’, can say it’s done, while the ‘woman’ of your world says it’s too late!”
Annie’s emotions were tumbling and bubbling with personal pride to conquer the world and then outer space, and ‘that’ would be just for starters. She had never felt so all- powerful in her life. She wanted the world and she knew she could have it, but as a ‘female’ and ‘not’ as a woman. Now she knew what she’d been doing wrong all those years!
Now she felt she really knew! Her breathing had deepened as her chest had swelled and had risen with such a strong sense of pride her shoulders had squared without her knowing it. Her stomach had gently tensed. She felt great! She felt strong! She felt powerful... and she felt... ‘Female!’
“’You’ will act ‘now’!” He told her. “Because ‘now’ is all you have! Let your lazy ‘woman’ of your world look forward to the future with dread and back to the past with depression, while she reserves tomorrow as the day of her labors! Your ‘female’ is not lazy!’Tomorrow’ is the day your ‘woman’ becomes good! Your ‘female’ is not evil! ‘Tomorrow’ is the day when your ‘woman’ becomes strong! Your ‘female’ is not weak! ‘Tomorrow’ is the day when your ‘woman’ will succeed! Your ‘female’ is not a failure! ‘You’ will act ‘now!’ and know from this moment onwards the ‘difference’ between your woman and your ‘female’ and ‘which’ one is most valued!”
Annie was no longer thinking and she knew it. She was ‘feeling’... ‘Everything’!
“When the lion is hungry... he eats.” He told her, lowering his tone. Her vision instantly filled with the dusty rolling plains of Africa, snarling hungry lions all gathered around their kill, fighting for their survival.
“When the eagle is thirsty... she drinks.” He said next. “Unless they ‘act’, both will perish.”
She saw a magnificent large brown eagle atop of a tall mountain, surveying all its territory it called its natural home, gazing down with a strong pride in ownership and of knowing where its place fitted in perfectly with the natural order and structure of all nature itself.
“You hunger for success you have never experienced.” He told her calmly “You thirst for a natural happiness and a natural peace of mind you have yet to ‘feel’. But unless you allow your ‘female’ to ‘act’ you’ll perish in a life of failure, misery and sleepless lonely nights, or at the best... mediocrity.”
Annie vowed in her soul that she would never allow it to happen. She wouldn’t! She just wouldn’t! It was ‘her’ life and ‘her’ right to be ‘who’ she really was-a ‘female’!
“’You’ will command your ‘woman’ to take her natural second place in your life, and let your ‘female’ take charge of that life and happiness from this moment onwards!” He told her, his tone of voice again beginning to rise. “And you will ‘obey’ your own command! ‘You’ will act ‘now’, because success and happiness won’t wait for your ‘female’ forever. If you delay, they will become engaged to another and lost to you forever.”
Annie would not allow that to happen. She would not ‘let’ that happen. She wouldn’t!
“’This’ is the time!” He said firmly. “’This’ is the place! And your ‘female’ is the one!” Annie’s chest filled with a natural sense of pride that felt absolutely empowering inside and out!
“’You’ will act... ‘Now’!”
Her gaze locked and loaded with his last word. His eyes suddenly sparkled and flashed again. They were beautiful to watch. Annie breathed deeply, feeling her chest expand outwards even more so with the amazing amount of pride in herself that she could feel now. It coursed through every vein in her body! She looked down at him! He looked up at her!
She looked down at him looking up at her! He looked up at her looking down at him! Annie was waiting! She could feel it, but she didn’t know what for! Something was coming! The build-up and then? What? Something!
Yes! But what? Where to now? She needed to go there- right now! She was ready! A build-up! A door! To where? What’s next? What’s coming? Something! Anything! What? She needed to go! To do! Something! Somewhere!
“Are you ‘ready’ to pose ‘nude’... now?” He asked her quietly.
His eyes seemed to flash and sparkle like the fourth of July at its peak as he waited for her answer. Annie’s mind hesitated only briefly. Her thoughts froze momentarily. Her mouth opened silently without speech, and her ‘feeling’ mind and emotions then took their natural lead. She answered in her mind first and noticed how good she felt immediately, and, without feeling guilty.
“Yes!” Her female’s voice answered in a rush with a confident tone and a cheeky smile. She felt her own eyes sparkling and shining with ‘all’ of her combined, and in perfect agreement with her honest answer. His eyes glistened and sparkled back at her with his accompanying strong white smile.
“That’s fine.” He told her as he rose and stood facing her, knowing that the beginnings of her ‘female’ he’d wanted had now finally answered the add, even though her ‘patience’ still obviously needed work. “You’re, doing ‘perfectly’.”
Annie grinned and then smiled widely back at him, and didn’t know why. She felt lost in the sparkle and crackle of his shining eyes. She couldn’t help herself. ‘Something’ in her had changed. She didn’t know what, only that it had, and any change was as good as a holiday. God knows she’d needed one lately, from her life... as a ‘woman’.
“What’s your favourite animal?” He asked her as he walked around the chair upon which she sat in the middle of his studio that had previously lain hidden from her view through the doorway that had been draped with a huge drop sheet.
“Dogs or cats.” Annie answered; feeling a little strange sitting on a chair in the middle of a large room that for the most part was empty, except for easels scattered around the place, a small table and two chairs and a tiny fridge. A large mattress lay behind the table with pillows and sheets neatly folded on top of it.
“A thing that always fascinates me.” He told her, still slowly walking around where she sat on the chair. “Is the way in which so many animals carry their young. Do you know what I mean?”
Annie knew what he meant. They carried their young by the neck, or the loose skin of it, gripping it with their mouth. She wished he’d find the final sitting position he wanted her in so they could get on with it. He had not yet asked her to take off her clothes.
Once she had said yes to modeling in the nude for him, he had led her through and into the room she was now in. He called it his studio. Dragging one of the chairs into the centre he’d told her to sit on it while he found her natural seated position for the initial sketches he intended to do of her before committing any of them in concept as an oil painting on canvas.
She had changed positions a dozen times already, yet still he didn’t seem satisfied. She felt like an animal at the zoo with him slowly walking around her in circles. She looked up at him whenever he spoke as he moved constantly around her chair.
“Yes.” He answered. “That’s right. She simply grips it by the nape of the neck with her teeth, and it swings there limp and relaxed. A moment before it may have been lively and jumping all over the place.”
Annie had seen mother cats carry their young like that and had always wondered why it hadn’t hurt the baby cub. He paused again in his circling of her chair to stand behind her and to her left. She turned her neck all the way round and looked up at him.
“The moment the cub’s neck is gripped, this lively young creature becomes as floppy, as limp, as loose, and as relaxed as a bundle of washing.” He told her. “And of course, there’s a good reason for this happening the natural way it does.”
Annie’s neck was beginning to ache and her eyes were becoming tired from gazing up at him while he spoke. Then, thankfully, he began slowly circling her chair once again. She relaxed her neck muscles, turned and faced the front, blinking several times to moisten her dry eyes. She waited for him to tell him what the reasons were. Her natural curiosity had been made interested.
“Over millions of years.” He began, and began pacing at the same time, such that her neck and gaze had to travel from side to side with him. Then he paused behind her again, this time to her right. She turned and looked up at him. “Nature has developed a simple reflex in the young. The moment the skin of their neck is gripped, the process of switching off all activity is totally automatic. You can easily picture that, can’t you?”
She nodded and it hurt. Annie pictured some sort of circuitry in the cub’s neck that said ‘off’ on one side, and ‘on’ on the other. Her eyes were becoming tired and her neck was beginning to get stiff. She wished he’d sit and talk then find her most ideal seated position later.
“A mother tiger doesn’t have to say; ‘Now, be a good little cub. I’m going to help you. Come with me without struggling. Relax and be still.’ No. She doesn’t. She just grips the back of its neck and the cub immediately becomes limp, loose, and totally relaxed and calm.”
Not that she wasn’t finding his story interesting, she was, but Annie was also becoming very sore in the neck and shoulders. And her eyes were really becoming dry and very, very tired, always looking up at him. They seemed to be blinking more and more, and the room wasn’t that well ventilated, it seemed. Then gratefully, he began to circle her chair once more. She turned to the front and relaxed the aching muscles in her neck and closed her eyes just for a few seconds.
The sheer relief was incredible. A giant wave of relaxation washed over her mind and body from the top of her head to the tip of her toes. Then he paused again behind her, this time again on her left. She sighed and turned, then looked up into his sparkling eyes once again.
It had been nice while it lasted. Visions of how peaceful that cub must feel when picked up like that by the neck began to gently invade her imagination.
“You might be wondering how this reflex works.” He began again as he moved to the other side of her. She turned slowly, and somewhat painfully, her eyes blinking several times before finally focusing on his. They still sparkled. They still shined, while her own felt as heavy as lead, as if they had sand in them.
“Well.” He said. " It’s in the spine at the back of the neck that certain important parts of the nervous system are found. Technical names that you may have heard of are the Ascending Reticular System, or the nuclei of Raphe, which are central to all matters to do with arousal or sleep. The activation of certain parts of these systems leads to arousal: they make you feel really wide wake. Other parts have the opposite effect; they make ‘you’ feel really, really, drowsy.”
Annie felt right then that if she closed her eyes they’d never open again; such had the strain on them become while always looking up at him when he’d been speaking. Her neck ached and so did her shoulders. Then he began to walk around her again.
Her whole body breathed a huge sigh of relief as the muscular tension flooded and flowed from her neck and shoulders. Her eyes slammed shut and bathed themselves in their own cooling soothing liquid for several long moments until she opened them again at the sound of his voice behind her and to the right.
She turned her face around and upwards, forcing her tired eyes open once more to focus on his face. It wasn’t easy, but she finally managed to get his eyes in focus and keep them there, albeit blinking very heavily several times every minute in doing so.
“I say, ‘you’, because detailed experiments have shown that these structures are present in people as well, and indeed, all mammals. So you can see that the minute the skin of the cub’s neck tightens, nerves immediately communicate the fact to the nerve centers of the spinal chord of the neck and say, quite irresistibly, ‘Limp, loose, and relaxed-sleepy, eyes closed, head down, just come along with me.’ This is so much easier for the mother tiger than for her to have to verbalize it, don’t you think? Especially since she has her mouth full? Isn’t Nature wonderful?”
Annie felt her head nod, but she didn’t choose to make it happen. She related with and to the little cub in every possible sense. Right then she knew she wouldn’t even need anyone to grip her by the neck for her to become exactly as the cub-limp, loose and relaxed, and fast, fast asleep, such was the state of her tired neck muscles and eyes. Once again she was instantly thankful when he began to slowly circle her chair once more.
Wave after wave of tension-leaving feelings flooded out of her aching neck and shoulders. Her eyelids slammed shut like two runaway garage doors. It was heaven-absolute heaven. When he began to speak again, it was a real effort for Annie just to get her eyes to open, let alone turn her head to look up and behind to her left at him. Her neck was sore and her shoulders stiffened over already-tired and aching muscles once more.
“And.” He began again. “As I said, we humans have the same centers in the brain as the little baby cub has. I wonder if ‘you’ve’ ever wondered how the little baby tiger cub feels while it’s being carried that way?”
Annie didn’t have to wonder-she ‘knew’. The cub would feel exactly as ‘she’ would and could, if he would only stop bloody talking and stay still long enough for her to rapidly enter noddy land with a real vengeance.
“Of course.” He told her. “We can’t ask the cub what it’s feeling, but it seems to me that Nature generally makes pleasurable whatever is necessary. When you’re hungry, eating is necessary, so it’s a pleasure. Sex is necessary for the preservation of the species and is therefore also a pleasure. When you’re thirsty or tired the necessary actions of drinking and sleeping each has been provided with a measure of pleasure.”
Annie knew it would give her the greatest measure of pleasure right at that point in time to stuff a giant sock into his mouth so she could join the bloody cub and sack out for a few hundred undisturbed years or so. She enjoyed a brief respite only from the tiredness and the tension while he walked once only around her chair before beginning to speak once again. She struggled to turn her head and look up at him once more.
“The cub certainly ‘looks’ happy.” He began again. “So, I think you could presume that since it’s necessary that it be carried by the neck that way, it would feel at least a measure of pleasure in it. And we humans have the same centers in our brains, too. I think that if ‘I’ were that cub then the ‘feeling’ of being carried by the neck that way would go something like this.”
Annie cleared her focus, or attempted to, at least, as she waited for him to describe how he would feel. She finally managed it, but it hurt.
“It would probably start with a measure of pleasure in the skin of my neck, quickly followed by a warm, all-over feeling of being cared for. This would probably then lead to a ‘feeling’ of total, blissful relaxation, as all of the muscles of my body went limp, loose, and completely and utterly relaxed. My head would fall forward onto my chest like this.”
Annie watched him through her tired eyes as his head quickly dropped limp and loose onto his chest, as if somebody had pulled out his plug. Then he straightened it again and looked down at her.
“It would be one of the great pleasures of lifelike sleep, but not asleep. Like flying through the air with no effort-blissful, relaxed. Nothing could be nicer I wouldn’t think.”
Annie agreed wholeheartedly and fought with all her effort to keep her eyes open. She kept losing her focus on his face and several times felt as if she were about to drift off.
“Now.” He commenced talking again before she had finished finding her focus on his face and eyes. “That reflex in a person is one which can be used to bring about the deepest level of relaxation in a person’s body and mind that it’s possible to create. I’ll show you, if you like, how easy it is to do it like the animals. With your permission, I’ll gently grip the skin of your neck and you’ll at once feel a ‘sudden’ and very ‘strong’ wave of relaxation come quickly over your mind and body. Your head will fall instantly forward onto your chest and you’ll feel absolutely wonderful! Would you ‘like’ that?”
Annie’s head nodded gently for her. Her mind was already beginning to travel elsewhere looking for a fluffy cuddly baby tiger cub that was fast asleep in its mother’s mouth. She fought to remain aware of what was going on, of what he was doing and saying.
She felt as if she was waiting for something to happen, but she’d lost the thought of anything he’d just said. She blinked several times to try and clear her floating mind and senses, but it wasn’t working very well. And suddenly, then it did... happen!
She felt his warm hand gently grip the skin on the back of her neck. It drew back gently and tightened slightly. It seemed as if somebody turned off ‘her’ switch and sent her body, her mind and her sensory awareness of anything or anyone to join the little baby tiger cub, wherever that happened to be.
Annie hadn’t resisted the feeling of her lungs suddenly deflating with a heavy sigh, or her heavy, heavy head dropping like a rock forward onto her chest. She hadn’t resisted anything. Annie Summers just went down and out... for the count.
Mike Jones looked down at the deeply hypnotised model in the chair and smiled warmly, placing one restraining hand on her left shoulder to stop her falling forward and onto the floor. With each slow and easy deep breath she took she leaned further and further forward against his firm hand holding her steady.
Gently he eased her back upright against the chair’s back, although her head remained deeply forward and down against her chest. He could easily hear her deep rhythmic breathing and knew that the beautiful and impatient Annie Summers was in the deepest of deep, sound, hypnotic slumbers.
“That’s fine.” He told her softly with a smile in his voice. “You’re doing perfectly.”