The Erotic Mind-Control Story Archive

The last of the guests left around midnight. Jennifer stayed in the kitchen, gathering up the trash and packaging leftovers so nobody would see just how fragile she was. She wished she could say she was surprised, but Tom had always been callous with her feelings.

And that was the whole problem, wasn’t it? She knew what he was like, but she kept coming back because that callousness catered to her kinks. Still, there was a difference between being called a filthy cunt in bed and a dirty slut in front of everyone at his birthday party.

“The party I fucking planned,” Jennifer muttered, shoving the last of the paper plates into the trash bag. “God, I’m so stupid.”

She sighed and sat down at the table. Stupid and cowardly since she hadn’t done anything except blink at him dumbly before retreating into the kitchen. She should have left. Or slapped him. Or said something. But he had laughed, and then his friends had joined in, and her choices were flee or cry.

She was glad she hadn’t invited her friends. Kari and the others probably wouldn’t have come. They universally despised Tom, and his little outburst wouldn’t have improved matters.

She wiped at her eyes which were, thankfully, mostly dry. Crying would just make things worse. She cocked her head, listening to Tom usher out the last guest. With everyone gone, she couldn’t avoid a confrontation. She took a deep breath, feeling tears prickle at her eyes, and willed them to wait.

One of her cluster headaches chose that moment to flare to life. Jennifer bit back a gasp and pressed her palm against her right eye, feeling the tears she willed back hot against her palm.

Fuck, not now! Her drugs were at home, along with the little black logbook she had to keep as part of the new drug trial. She glanced at the microwave clock. Four past twelve. All right. She could remember that. Just in case, though, she should find a napkin or something to write down the time. Wasn’t there a pen on the counter?

“You’re still here?”

Tom was leaning against the archway to the main room, his aristocratic face set in its default sneer. Jennifer blinked at him and straightened up. “I thought I’d clean up,” she said. And then she mentally kicked herself. Why should she clean for him?

Tom snorted. “You’re not much of a maid. Living room’s still a mess.”

She drew in a sharp breath. Finally! It was about time her anger came back from vacation. Maybe the headache—she hissed through another stab of pain—was good for something.

“Hire a real maid!” She smacked the pen back down on the counter. “You’re welcome for planning the party, by the way. I’m glad you had a good birthday.”

“What, no birthday sex?”

She glared at him. “Should have saved the dirty talk for the bedroom.”

“Oh? Is that why you’re pouting?”

“You don’t need to be a bastard to me all the time. It’s hot in bed, not in front of your friends.”

Tom gave her a vicious smile. “I’ve read your journal. If you didn’t want to be treated like a whore, you wouldn’t write those little stories.”

“You...” she drew back. “They’re fantasies!”

He shrugged.

“Don’t you ever fantasize about things you’d never do?”

“No.”

She blinked at him. Well, she shouldn’t be shocked. It explained everything so perfectly. “I don’t think I should see you anymore.”

Tom stepped back to clear the doorway. “Like you haven’t said that before.” He stretched and started towards the bedroom, and for once, she didn’t melt at the play of lean muscles beneath his shirt. “You’ll be back before the week’s out.”

Not this time. She grabbed her keys and hurried out. At least she had been smart enough to keep her own place. God, if she had actually moved in with him the last time her lease was up...she shivered at the thought.

The crisp night air helped settle her head as she walked the four blocks to her apartment. The cluster headache still stabbed at her eye, but by the time she got home, it had faded to half-hearted poking.

It was hardly worth taking the drugs, but she had agreed to take a pill every time she had a cluster headache as part of the trial. She had also agreed to thoroughly document each headache, and right now, that seemed like too much effort. It was late. She was exhausted, and she had an early meeting with her advisor tomorrow to go over her dissertation. Couldn’t she cheat just this once? The doctor running the trial would never have to know.

Her headache, naturally, sent a sharp stab of pain as soon as she decided she could cheat. She groaned. “You’re just determined to make me be a good girl, aren’t you?”

The headache, of course, didn’t answer. She was in pain, yes, but not so out of it to think it would actually talk back. She took the pill and flipped to the nearest empty page in her log.

September 4, 2006 12:04am—Headache came while at a friend’s birthday party. Typical symptoms, but not as intense as at the beginning of the trial. Pain seemed to get better once I got outside. Took one pill at 12:42am.

Jennifer tapped her pen against the page. She was supposed to be honest, but writing the next part made her feel like a fool. She sighed. She was just a number in this trial, not Jennifer Dorsey, Ph.D. candidate and fucked up slut.

This headache may have been triggered by stress and/or anger due to a confrontation with my boyfriend at the party.

There. That was safe (and honest) enough. She could go to sleep with a clear conscience. Well, clear with respect to the drug trial anyway.

And, fuck, the drug was good. By the time she had showered, brushed her teeth, and slid between the snuggly sheets, the headache was gone, gone, gone. Nothing else compared to it. It was enough to let her fall asleep with a tiny smile.

Morning came too soon, as it always did when she had to take a pill. Jennifer woke with the sheets tangled around her legs like restraints, her thighs slick, and the jittery-yet-relaxed feeling she got after her best orgasms.

She closed her eyes and slumped against the pillow. Again? She really wished she could remember the dreams, because if her current condition was any indication, they were hot. She allowed herself to enjoy her blissful state for a few minutes, hoping her brain would tease her with an image or two from the dream. Sometimes, it did. Like that lovely image of her in elaborate rope bondage from a few weeks back. She still masturbated to that image sometimes, imagining the feel of the rope sliding around her breasts and thighs as her lover bound her. Sometimes, she even went as far as to light a pumpkin spice candle and drape a bit of red gauze over her bedside lamp so her room took on the same smell and the same red glow as her dream.

She had no such luck this morning, though a snippet of dream dialogue came to her as she disentangled herself from the sheets: “You’re being punished because you’re not smart about your desires, darling.”

Well, starting today, she was. No more Tom, and no more thinking with her cunt.

She filled out the rest of her headache entry on the bus to campus. She did not mention the dream.

Kari found her at lunch. “A little birdie told me the girls and I need to take you out for a drink tonight. E-9 sound good?”

Jennifer ran through a mental list of people at Tom’s party. Of all the people there, Lee Fink was probably the only one who was her friend as well as Tom’s. And he had been the only one who didn’t laugh at Tom’s outburst. “Would the little birdie have the initials L.F.?”

“Maybe,” Kari said, drawing out the word. She was the only person Jennifer knew who could get away with that sickeningly coy sing-song tone. Probably because she was the only person Jennifer knew who was a natural perky blonde.

She was tempted to say no, but it was Friday, and it had been ages since she’d gone out with the girls. “Yeah. E-9 sounds great. How about I meet you there? I have office hours until four. I can meet you there at say, five?”

“Sounds good.” Kari swiped the cupcake from Jennifer’s tray. “E-9 at five. I’ll tell Erin and Casey.”

“Hey, you better leave that! It’ll go straight to your thighs!”

“I’m saving you from yourself, sweetheart. Later!”

Jennifer refrained from getting another cupcake, but only because of their E-9 date. Unlike Kari’s thighs, hers did not distinguish between cupcake calories and beer calories.

Of course, after a few beers with the girls, Jennifer didn’t really care about the state of her thighs. She didn’t think anything could ruin their fun, but halfway through their second pitcher of pale ale, Tom walked into E-9 with a little skank hanging off his arm. Jennifer knew he saw them. He gave her a brief smirk, the one he paired with his dirty talk, and drew the teeny blonde closer to him.

Jennifer did her best to ignore him. She knew what he wanted, and she would not give him the pleasure of a scene. But her attention kept wandering back to the bar. Anger flared at the base of her skull, pounding in time to her pulse. The little shit! The predictable little shit! He’d done the same thing the last time she’d broken things off with him.

She forced herself to listen to Kari, who was telling an elaborate story about a recent presentation. Jennifer welcomed the occasional tap from Kari’s over-eager hands because it gave her something else to focus on.

When she made the mistake of glancing at the bar again, Tom had his tongue down the skank’s throat. The girl leaned up on tiptoe, and it hiked her tight skirt up a tad past decent. She looped her fingers through Tom’s belt loops and shimmied up along his thigh. Tom broke the kiss and gave Jennifer his nasty smirk again as he cupped the girl’s ass.

Jennifer’s anger spiked. Pain blossomed in her right eye. For a moment, the room smelled crisp, like autumn, and a thin red film tinted her vision. Then it popped, and the pain was gone, and everything was a little too sharp.

Jennifer pressed cool fingers to her eye. Had that been a headache? It hadn’t felt the same, but her eye was watering, and she was certain if she stumbled to the bathroom, she’d find it bloodshot when she looked in the mirror.

“Oh my God,” Kari said, slamming her mug down on the table for emphasis. “I can’t believe...Jennifer, the sex can’t be that good.”

“It’s not,” Jennifer lied. Her voice sounded thick. She stood carefully, because even though her vision had cleared, the rest of her felt wobbly. “I need some air,” she said. “Alone,” she added when Kari started to stand.

Kari didn’t look entirely convinced, but she settled back down and glared at Tom.

Tom leaned down and whispered something in his date’s ear. She turned, laughed, and waved at Jennifer. Jennifer waved back and blew them a kiss. No way she’d go back to him this time.

It was drizzling outside. Jennifer stepped out from under the awning and tilted her head back, enjoying the cool mist settling on her skin. The sweet fragrance from the hanging basket by the door almost masked the disgusting smell of wet pavement, so Jennifer focused on the flowers.

Her pulse settled. The last of the wobbly feeling faded so she felt right again. She took a deep breath and steeled herself to go back inside.

“Squabble with the boyfriend?” a familiar voice drawled.

Jennifer startled and snapped to attention. A lanky man stood under the streetlamp across the street, arms crossed lazily over his chest. He was outlined in sliver until Jennifer realized she had water droplets clinging to her eyelashes and blinked them away.

“Ex, and I left before it became a squabble.”

“Pity. Most people enjoy drunken entertainment.”

Jennifer laughed. He crossed the street, and now she could make out his face—high cheekbones, dark eyes, and a twisted little half-grin to match his drawl. His face was vaguely familiar, like his voice, but she couldn’t place him.

She drew herself up. “I will have you know I am not drunk. Yet.”

Flirting with him was probably a bad idea—Tom was proof enough of her horrible taste in men, and before him, there had been Michael—but the combination of his voice and his grin sent all of Jennifer’s reason straight to her cunt.

He quirked an eyebrow. “Merely tipsy?”

“Happy.” Then she remembered why she was out here. “Well, I was happy and well on my way to being tipsy. Now, sadly, I am sober.”

“Good.” He said, and then, before Jennifer could react, he had her pressed against the wall, her hands pinned, his knee between her thighs.

She managed to squeak before he kissed her roughly. She squirmed, enjoying the scrape of the brick against the back of her hands and shoulders. She could feel the wall’s dampness seeping through her shirt and jeans. She wouldn’t be able to go back into the bar like this, and it was that knowledge that made her kiss him back. If she was going to look indecent, she wanted to get something out of it, and God, she had never gotten so wet and weak in the knees from a single kiss. Not outside her fantasies, anyway, but then, this kiss was straight out of one of her favorites.

He broke away a moment before the door to E-9 burst open and Kari stumbled out with some help from Erin and Casey. The three of them blinked at Jennifer. It would have been comical if it hadn’t been for the identical looks of concern on their faces.

“Um,” Jennifer said, smoothing down her shirt. “It’s okay. Really.”

Her not-really-an-assailant backed away, hands held up in surrender. “I look forward to seeing you again, Jennifer.”

“Um, likewise,” she said as he sauntered off. Had they met before? She would have remembered someone like him. She’d have to think about it later. Right now, she had to do damage control.

Her friends’ expressions hadn’t changed. She smiled at them. “Oh, come on, don’t give me those looks. It was just a kiss.”

Kari recovered first. “It’s always just a kiss with you. Then you end up with a bastard like Tom. He called you a dirty slut, Jennifer, and all because you smiled when you handed one of his friends a beer.”

Jennifer rubbed at her hands, trying to ignore her tiny spark of anger. Kari was just looking out for her, but...“You had quite the conversation with that little birdie.”

Kari pursed her lips into a thin line.

Jennifer sighed. “I didn’t mean it like that. Look, it was nothing.”

“Not even tit for tat?” Kari asked.

“Yeah, and wasn’t it effective, doing it out here where Tom wouldn’t see?” Jennifer turned and started in the direction of her apartment. It would be a long walk. At least it would clear her head. Hadn’t she promised herself she wouldn’t think with her cunt? She was hopeless.

“Wait!” Kari ran the few steps to catch up with Jennifer and grabbed her wrist. “It’s just...look, I know I’ve always said Tom is an ass, but I don’t like seeing you hurt. Are you all right?”

“Yeah. I’m fine. I just want to go home now.”

Kari linked her arm through Jennifer’s. “Fair enough. Just humor me, all right? Let us walk you there?”

Jennifer clamped down on another annoying flare of anger. She didn’t need an escort, but in Kari’s position, she’d be doing the same thing. So she gave Kari a playful nudge and said, “You’re just hoping I’ll share my tequila.”

“I’ll be saving you from yourself if I drink it, sweetheart.”

“Only because you’re a freak who can handle beer and hard liquor.”

“Benefit of an engineering degree. You mathematicians are so wimpy!”

“You say that now. Just wait. Twenty years from now, I’ll have the friendly liver.” Jennifer grinned at Casey and Erin over her shoulder. “Besides, we both know chemists are the best drinkers.”

She laughed as they ran with the argument. “We can make our own booze!” and “We have the coolest glassware!” Kari sputtered and tried to come up with a counter-argument as they sauntered along the residential streets bordering campus.

They didn’t make it to Jennifer’s apartment. Halfway there, it started to pour, so they ran, laughing, the remaining block to the cute little house Erin and Casey rented with two other girls. They were home, thankfully, and were kind enough to bring thick, fluffy towels to the entrance so the four of them could dry off enough to keep from dripping on the carpet.

They were also kind enough to loan Jennifer and Kari sweats, and then all six of them gathered in the living room to watch old Bogart movies and marvel at the occasional rumble of thunder and burst of lightning. Rainstorms rarely came with special effects, so they all agreed this one was a special treat.

When Jennifer finally made it back to her apartment at dawn, she had almost forgotten about the strange headache and her not-really-an-assailant. The light on her answering machine was blinking. She checked her Caller ID, saw that the only missed call was from Tom, and stared at the blinking light. She’d regret listening to the message.

She played it anyway.

“She’s a better fuck than you,” Tom’s voice said, and in the background, just before he hung up, Jennifer heard a high-pitched feminine giggle.

Her vision got that thin red film again. All Jennifer could hear was her own pulse in her ears, and then pain exploded behind her eye. She gasped and steadied herself against the doorframe. Oh, sweet fuck! Nothing had ever hurt this bad!

She fumbled with the bottle of her medication, the pain and tears making it hard to see what she was doing. She swallowed a pill dry and curled into a tiny ball on her bed. Eventually, she managed to even out her breathing and slip into sleep.

The thin red film stayed with her in her dreams. Her not-really-an-assailant had her up against the wall outside of E-9 again, only now, jack-o-lanterns lined the sidewalk. The scents of fall were so thick, she could taste them in the back of her throat.

He didn’t draw back as the door burst open. Jennifer tried to break away to tell Kari and the girls that everything was fine, but he leaned into her so the top of his thigh rested firmly between her legs, and all she could think about was grinding against it.

“You really are a dirty slut,” Tom said.

Jennifer made a helpless sound and bucked against her not-really-an-assailant. He broke the kiss then, and while Jennifer was panting, trying to catch her breath and enough of her thoughts to tell Tom off, he glanced over at Tom.

“But she’s not your dirty slut.”

The dream slipped away. Jennifer remembered it in dazzling detail when she woke, fuzzy-headed and thick-tongued. At least her vision was normal, and after a long, hot shower, the rest of her was back to normal, too. She sat down at the kitchen table with her headache log and tried to compose the entry over scrambled eggs and an English muffin. In the end, she recorded her new symptoms, made note of the previous headache, and wrote that the trigger was most likely a combination of alcohol and stress.

Her new headaches came daily, and her dreams were variations on the kiss in front of E-9. She actually enjoyed the dreams. More often than not, she ended up confronting Tom, and it was perhaps a little too enjoyable to scream at him in the safety of her own head. Especially if the confrontation came right after a pretty hot fuck against the wall. In her dreams, at least, post-orgasmic bliss and post-confrontation peace was an intense, almost addictive combination.

But the headaches worried her, so her next doctor’s appointment couldn’t come fast enough. She was antsy as he checked her eyes, tested her reflexes, and reviewed the last two weeks of entries in her log.

“You say the first of these new headaches was likely triggered due to alcohol and stress? How so?”

Jennifer looked away. The doctor looked so much like her grandfather that it was hard to be frank with him. “I had a falling out with my boyfriend. He’s...not very nice. My girlfriends didn’t want me to be alone that first Friday, so we met for drinks at a bar. I don’t know if he knew about our plans, or if he was just out, but he came into the bar with an undergrad, and...” she shrugged. “I think the first new headache came when I saw them together.”

The doctor studied her for a moment. “I see.” He flipped through her log. “And you’re also finishing up your dissertation, if I recall correctly?”

“Yes.”

“Well.” He set the log down. “A Ph.D. program and relationship problems are stressful enough on their own. I’m inclined to agree with your assessment that these headaches are caused by stress, but just to be safe, I’d like to schedule an MRI.”

Jennifer nodded. “All right.”

He smiled and patted her hands. “It’s likely nothing. Go about your normal routine.”

“Thank you.”

She had Kari come with her for her MRI two days later. She had gotten one at the start of the trial and remembered being terrified of the small space about halfway through the scan. She was relieved this one wasn’t as frightening.

She was further relieved when the doctor told her everything was fine. Until he said, “I’d like to send these images to one of my colleagues at Washington University.”

Jennifer sucked in her lower lip. “Why?”

“There’s some interesting activity in the auditory and visual areas of your brain. Nothing to worry about,” he added quickly as Jennifer’s eyes widened, “Just interesting.”

“Why?”

“Well, it may be something unique to you, or it may be something related to the drug. If it’s related to the drug, it may have other applications.”

“But nothing’s wrong?”

“Nothing at all.”

She didn’t quite believe him, grandfatherly demeanor aside, but she couldn’t think of a good reason to deny his request. “All right. Go ahead and share them.”

She signed the release forms and went to find Kari. Jennifer found her in the hospital cafeteria, poking at a lump of green Jell-O with a spork. “That’s disgusting,” she said, sliding into the seat across from Kari.

“It’s wigglicious.”

“Don’t you dare eat that in front of me.”

Kari tisked. “You mathematicians. So wimpy! Can’t handle tequila. Can’t handle Jell-O...” She gathered up her tray. “Ready to go? Or do you want to eat lunch here?”

“No! I want to go before they change their mind and find something wrong with me.”

“Quick, then, before the men in the white coats come for you!”

Jennifer laughed and followed Kari out of the cafeteria.

“I think your clean bill of health calls for a celebration,” Kari said as they stepped out into the sunshine.

Jennifer slid on her sunglasses. “Let me guess. E-9 with the girls?”

“I was thinking dancing. Just you and me. It’s been so long.”

“Yeah. It has.” Tom really had taken up too much of her time. “You going to drive?”

“Of course. I’ll pick you up at eight.”

“Eight is great!”

Kari elbowed her in the ribs. “You’re such a dope.”

The dance club was fun for about two hours. Then Jennifer felt the stirrings of another headache pulsing in tune to the bass. She disentangled herself from her current partner and went to find Kari. She found her at the bar flirting with one of the military boys on leave.

“Sorry to interrupt,” she said, smiling at the kid to let him know she’d back off in a second. He looked yummy. Kari would have fun with him. “I’m going to have to take the bus home.” She tapped the corner of her right eye. “Head doesn’t like the bass.”

Kari almost managed to mask her longing look. “I can drive you—”

“You hush! The night is still young, and your military boy is cute. The busses are running. I’ll be fine.”

“If you’re sure...”

“Quite. I’ll call you in the morning, all right?”

“Right.”

Outside, she could still feel the bass pulsing at the base of her spine. Jennifer closed her eyes and leaned against the wall, willing her headache to fade. She had twenty minutes to kill before the next bus up the hill. Maybe she’d feel decent by then. When she opened her eyes again, she saw a familiar lanky figure across the street.

“Hello, Jennifer. Another encounter with the ex?” he asked in his mocking drawl.

Jennifer pushed herself away from the wall and stepped to the curb. “How do you know my name?”

“Maybe I’ve seen you around campus.”

Maybe, but she didn’t think so. She would have remembered seeing someone like him. He did look familiar, though.

“No. I’d remember you,” she said as he approached.

“How flattering.”

He was close enough now to touch her. He reached out and traced the line of her right eyebrow. Jennifer gulped and tried to move back, but he had his other hand around her waist and pressed her to him.

He trailed his hand down her throat, letting it settle above her collarbone. Jennifer licked her lips nervously. Her pulse quickened, a combination of fear and lust, and she tried, half-heartedly, to pull away again.

“I don’t think...” she said weakly.

“Am I supposed to say that’s a good state for you?”

She smiled. Damn, she was a dope. “Would be nice.” She leaned up as he dipped his head down and was ready for his kiss.

It wasn’t as rough as the one he gave her outside E-9, but it wasn’t some sloppy tender thing, either. She let him lead her into the alley behind the club even though she knew it was a horrible idea. She didn’t even know his name! But fuck, she was wet, and maybe a quick, rough, up-against-the-alley-wall fuck would get the last of her stupidity out of her system. Then she could find a nice boy like Lee Fink and settle down for sweet, vanilla sex.

His breath was hot against her face and neck as they maneuvered against the wall. His hands were cool as he fumbled with her pants, but they warmed up fast enough. He batted her hands away as she reached for his belt.

“Not yet,” he said, nipping at her ear. He slid one hand under her panties, teasing her with strong, thin fingers. His other hand was up her shirt, and she was so, so glad she hadn’t bothered with a bra, because the way he was teasing and pinching her nipple was just divine. She moaned.

“Yes, that’s it. Let me hear you. Tell me you’re a slut.”

The insult (compliment?) went straight to her cunt. Jennifer tipped her head back and gasped as he slid a finger into her. “Fuck, yes, such a slut!” she said, and she moaned again as he dipped his head down to suck on her other nipple through her shirt.

She twined one hand in his hair and braced the other against the wall. He drew back slightly, planted a biting kiss at the hollow of her throat, and said, “Tell me more,” before moving to her other breast.

She linked a leg around his calf. “I want you to fuck me right here. I—gnnh—want you to lift me up and sink your cock deep into my cunt. I want it so hard that the wall bruises my back. And then—ahh—when you’re done, I want to collapse on the ground and watch you tuck your cock back in your pants and walk away.”

“Without a second glance?” He had her shirt shoved up over her breasts and added another finger to tease her cunt with long, slow strokes. She arched against his palm, but every time she had her clit almost in position, he changed the angle of his hand.

“Oh, God, yes!” She tried reaching for his belt again.

He withdrew his fingers from her cunt and swatted her hands again. “I said not yet.” And he slid two fingers in her mouth.

She moaned as he fucked her mouth with his fingers. This was straight out of one of her fantasies. She supposed it should disturb her. Public sex was one of those things she thought she’d only indulge in the safety of her mind. Oh, how wrong she was!

He kept the fingers in her mouth as he drew back to undo his pants with his free hand. “I’ll fuck you, but I’m not in the habit of walking away from hot little sluts.”

She made a tiny needy sound. He smiled, withdrew his fingers, and ran his thumb along her bottom lip. “Turn around.”

The order sent a fluttering thrill through her. She turned and bent over, bracing her palms on wall. He grabbed her hips, lined himself up, and thrust in.

Jennifer gasped. His fingers hadn’t really prepared her, and that was fine because the sudden shock of being stretched wide felt so good. She moved with his trusts, biting back the loudest of her moans.

It was perfect. He was demanding, setting a pace that satisfied him. Jennifer fought to keep up, enjoying the bounce of her breasts and the solidness of the brick beneath her palms.

He reached around and fondled her. His hands on her breasts—so hot, so ruthless—made it harder to hold back her moans. She wanted to reach down and take care herself, but he was so relentless, she was afraid she’d lose her balance and smash her head against the wall.

And really, wasn’t the fantasy about being used? Jennifer groaned and lowered her head. Yes, used like some dirty little slut who couldn’t get enough cock. She imagined a line of men behind him, all waiting for their turn. She imagined being forced to her knees, forced to suck and take until she had nothing left.

His thrusts grew more erratic just before he came. Jennifer cried out, feeling her own orgasm build, and then everything sparkled silver and she was clenching around his cock.

He drew out, panting. The slide of his hands down her stomach and around her hips was almost tender as he drew away. Jennifer rose, turned, and slumped against the wall. She couldn’t help what had to be a lazy, goofy smile.

“Maybe I should clean that off before you put it away,” she said.

He met her eyes. A ghost of a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “Maybe.”

She giggled and sunk to her knees.

“You taste good on me, don’t you?” he asked as she took his cock in her mouth.

She hummed her agreement and swirled her tongue around the head of his cock. The mixture of them did taste good. It was enough to make her want more, but she ignored her desire. She should go home and masturbate and forget about this man. He’d only end up like Tom.

She drew back and watched as he made himself presentable again. Then he knelt and grabbed her hair to tilt her head back for another rough kiss.

“You’re a good little slut,” he said as he rose.

It sent a wave of shameful pleasure through Jennifer. She moved to cover her breasts. Maybe this hadn’t been a healthy fantasy to act out.

He smiled like he knew what she was thinking. “You don’t need to worry.” He held out a hand, and Jennifer let him help her to her feet. “I’ll take good care of you.”

“I don’t think—”

“For starters, I’ll see you home safely. You missed your bus.”

Fear cut through her lingering lust. “I didn’t tell you I was taking the bus.”

He backed her up against the wall again. “Darling, there’s not much you need to tell me. We could go back into that club right now, and I could charm your little girlfriend. I can make her think I’m the best thing that’s happened to you.”

Jennifer shrunk back, tasting horror in the back of her throat.

He smiled. “It’s what you want.”

“No. It’s—”

He braced his hands on the wall on either side of her head and leaned in close. “You want to pretend you’re a sweet little innocent when you’re around your friends, and you want a partner who will let you.”

How did he know? Had Tom arranged this? He was sick enough to. She had to get away. This wasn’t—

He clamped a hand over her mouth as she drew in a sharp breath to scream. “Awww, darling, you’re on the wrong train of thought. Your ex has nothing to do with me.”

Jennifer squeezed her eyes shut, feeling tears trickle down her cheeks. This wasn’t good, especially since the balance between fear and lust was starting to equalize again. How often had she imagined a scenario like this? And how did he know?

This was how women got killed. And here she was practically begging for it.

He released her suddenly. Jennifer wobbled and thrust an arm against the wall to steady herself.

“Let’s get you home.”

“I don’t want you knowing where I live.”

He rattled off her address. Jennifer rubbed the goose bumps dotting her arms. “I don’t—” She stopped when he wrapped a hot hand around her upper arm.

“Home, darling. I’ll just drop you at the door if that makes you feel better.”

It didn’t, but she let him lead her to the parking lot because riding the bus in her condition was asking for trouble. And going back into the club was out of the question. Kari would kill her, and rightfully so.

She fished her keys out of her pocket and fanned them out between her fingers so she could jab him if he tried anything else. He noticed her action and gave a little snort.

“You’ll make it home safe. If I wanted you hurt, I would have walked away without a second glance. What do you think would happen to a pretty, freshly-fucked thing at the bus stop?”

“Nothing good.”

“Exactly.”

She hesitated when he unlocked the doors to an old VW Bug. Maybe she should go back inside for Kari. Maybe—

“Oh, God, Jennifer! Are you all right?”

Kari! Relief slid through her strong enough to make her legs shake. She turned, tucking the hand holding her keys behind her back. “Yeah. Yes. I’m fine.”

Kari hurried towards her, and as she drew nearer, Jennifer felt guilty for lying. Concern, fear, and anger mingled to make Kari’s expression one of terrifying ferocity. Jennifer was glad it was not directed at her.

“Who are you?” Kari demanded, coming up alongside Jennifer.

“Joe.” He gave them a bland smile over the hood of the Bug.

Kari cut a glance at Jennifer. “I’m sure it was a pleasure, Joe. We’re leaving now.”

His smile widened. “It was. I’ll see you later, Jennifer.”

Kari practically dragged her to the car. She drove in white-knuckled silence. Jennifer stared straight ahead taking quick, shallow breaths. She couldn’t remember the last time she had seen Kari this upset.

“At least tell me it was consensual,” Kari finally said. She pulled into the parking lot of a strip mall, throwing the car in park and jerking up the parking break in quick, angry motions.

Jennifer’s own anger surfaced. “Of course it was.”

“You’re so fucking stupid!”

“And it’s none of your fucking business!”

“You were about to get in a car with him.” Kari sighed and shut off the car. “You deserve better.”

The unspoken, “Like Lee Fink” hung heavy between them. Jennifer shrugged.

Kari sighed again and restarted the car. “Just be smart, all right? You deserve someone who will treat you like a princess.”

Jennifer stared blankly out the window as Kari pulled back out into the street. She didn’t want to be treated like a princess. That was the problem.

One benefit about her encounter with Joe was that it seemed to have cured her headaches. She hadn’t realized how distracting they had been until she could actually focus. She was almost a whole new Jennifer.

She was certainly a smarter Jennifer. No stupid encounters with strangers (fuck, she could have ended up pregnant or gotten an STD!), and the one time she did bump into Tom at the grocery store, no horrible scene. Best of all, she could almost ignore the tiny pinch of satisfaction when he looked disappointed at her lack of reaction.

And she was a relieved Jennifer when the drug trial drew to an end two months later. She practically skipped into her final appointment with her doctor.

“Knowing my luck,” she said as he reviewed her log, “I’m in the placebo group.”

He chuckled. “I was saying the same thing to my colleagues. Your progress under this trial has been remarkable. And you say you haven’t had a headache in nearly two months?”

“Just the occasional hunger headache. I’m on a roll with my dissertation. I keep forgetting to eat.”

“Careful, now. We can’t have you developing an eating disorder.”

Jennifer laughed. She filled out the end-of-trial paperwork, handed over her headache log and her remaining drugs, and promised the doctor she’d be back in touch if she suffered from a relapse.

She walked down to the waterfront, enjoying the heat and the sunshine and the shirtless boys roller-blading along the sidewalk. Gulls circled overhead, swooping down for the occasional morsel, and the salty tang of the water smelled crisp and fresh. She got an order of fish and chips and sat in one of the tiny parks nestled between waterfront restaurants.

Everything was perfect. Naturally, something had to go wrong.

Something came in the form of Joe. Jennifer felt his shadow sweep over her the instant before he spoke. “You certainly look satisfied.”

She stiffened. “I certainly am satisfied. What do you want?”

“Can’t I enjoy your company?” He came around the bench and sat next to her.

“Only platonically.”

“That’s no fun.” He stretched out, pressing his leg against hers.

Jennifer scooted away. “I was...weak the last time you saw me.”

“You’re still weak, darling, but you don’t need to worry. I’m not going to ravish you on a park bench in the middle of the day.” He snorted. “I’d get a sunburn on my ass.”

She found herself relaxing and giggling against her better judgment. He was pale. And he looked harmless basking in the sun like a lazy cat. Maybe he wasn’t like Tom.

Then she remembered the frightening things he had said in the alley behind the club. She could taste the echo of her horror in the back of her throat. Maybe he was worse than Tom.

She stood abruptly.

“Running away already?”

“It’s a long walk home.”

He gave her a half-smile. “I could give you a ride.”

“I’m sure you could.” Oh, she was going to regret the rest of her retort, but she couldn’t resist. “But I don’t want a sunburn, either.”

He snorted. “Suit yourself, darling. It’s a big hill.”

“There’s always the bus,” she said lightly.

“There’s a gang-bang joke somewhere in there.”

“I’m sure. Enjoy the sun. Don’t get burnt.”

“I don’t intend to, darling. The next time I see you, you won’t be so skittish.”

She didn’t quite run out of the park, but it was close.

Her hands were still shaking when the bus came. She sat in the middle, clasping her hands tightly in her lap, and tried not to focus on the way her stomach lurched with the bus as it chugged up the hill. Her fear was irrational. He hadn’t done anything, hadn’t really said anything entirely out of line. She had raunchier conversations with Kari.

But Kari was her friend. Joe was just a really good fuck. She clamped her thighs together. Really good. That fuck had fueled a number of fantasies and private moments.

The bus came to a jerky stop, pitching Jennifer forward. The rough motion sent a thrill though her, and she caught herself on the seat in front of her with a gasp. What was she doing, letting herself get so worked up on a fucking bus?

Yes, the encounter with Joe had been good, but it could have gone very, very wrong. Was that what turned her on? The threat?

She slumped back against her seat. And what about all those things he knew about her? She had done a good job of forgetting them because she hadn’t really expected to see Joe again. Yes, the campus was relatively small, but she had done a good job of avoiding Tom. She had made the mistake of thinking it would be easier to avoid a stranger.

But maybe Joe didn’t want to be avoided. He had said he was sure he’d see her again. Maybe he was stalking her. Jennifer shivered. The ache in her nipples and cunt made her feel ashamed and stupid.

Maybe this meeting had just been a coincidence. Jennifer clung to the thought until her arousal faded. That made her feel pathetic, but she figured being pathetic, ashamed, and stupid was better than being horny, ashamed, and stupid. She didn’t exercise the best judgment when she was horny.

Her first cluster headache after the conclusion of the drug trial couldn’t dampen her euphoria at completing her dissertation. As far as she was concerned, she could have a million tiny little fuckers stabbing away at her eye with pointy sticks. Her dissertation was done, baby, and her advisor loved it!

Perhaps the headache realized it could not dampen her spirits, because it ended up being pretty wimpy. Not that she was complaining. She could handle the headaches easily if they were going to be five quick annoying jabs. Maybe she still had some of that drug left in her system. Could she after two months? Jennifer had no idea and no real desire to find out. She had more important things to focus on.

Kari knocked on her door during her office hours. “Well, Doctor Dorsey, I think the completion of your dissertation calls for a celebration.”

Jennifer smiled. “I’m not a doctor yet. I still have to defend the fucker.”

Kari waved a hand. “A technicality. You’ll do fine.”

“You realize you’ve just jinxed me.”

“Well, let’s go to E-9 and unjinx you.” Kari flopped down in the chair by the door.

“I don’t think it works like that.”

“It will if we get enough pale ale in you.”

“I want stout.”

Kari stuck her tongue out. “Now you’re just being difficult.”

“It’s part of my charm. I can pop over to E-9 after five.”

Kari smiled and rose gracefully. “Sounds like a plan. I’ll see if I can get a little group together. With luck, you won’t have to buy a single beer.”

“Now that’s a plan.”

Kari left with a laugh and a wave. Jennifer tried not to rush through the rest of her day, but it was hard. And of course she kept looking at the clock every two minutes. Time never cooperated when you wanted it to speed up or slow down.

She hadn’t really been out since that night she went dancing with Kari. It was good to have somewhere to go, especially since it was Friday, springtime, and absolutely gorgeous outside.

E-9 was crowded, even for a Friday. Kari was already there when Jennifer arrived, and she had managed to get a little group together—Erin, Casey, and a few of their friends from other departments.

“Our guest of honor arrives!” Kari shoved a mug of stout into Jennifer’s hand. “Congratulations, doctor.”

“It’s not official yet.”

“We’ve already had this conversation.” Kari grinned. “Come on. Sit down. I’ll kick your ass at darts later.”

“You wish. I’ll wipe the floor with you.”

It ended up being a close game. In the end, three beers had just a bit of an influence on Jennifer’s hand-eye coordination, and she missed her last throw, giving Kari the victory.

Kari tisked as they settled back down in their seats, fresh mugs of beer in hand. “You mathematicians! So wimpy!”

“But dedicated, Ms. I-still-have-one-more-year-until-I’m-a-doctor.”

“Oooooh, low blow, loser.” Kari winked. “I’ll take a rain check on the beer you owe me since this is your celebratory night.” Her expression turned cold.

“What?” Jennifer asked.

“I can’t believe he came here.”

“Who?” Jennifer was afraid to look. “Tom?”

“No.”

“Hello, darling,” a familiar voice drawled. A moment later, Joe pulled up a chair and plunked down on it backwards, folding his arms over the back.

Kari narrowed her eyes. “What are you doing here?”

“Buying our almost-doctor a beer.” He took a pull of his and then rolled the bottle between his hands.

“As you can see, she’s doing just fine on that front.”

Joe gave her a half-smile. “I’ll just pick up the next one.”

Kari glared at him.

Jennifer cleared her throat. “It was sweet of you to come, Joe, but I think Kari wanted this to be a girls’ only thing.”

“So those fine young gentleman at the other end of the table are male-to-female transsexuals?”

Whoops. Jennifer offered him a sheepish smile. “I think Kari wanted to be in charge of the guest list.”

“Kari wanted this to be a friends’ only affair,” Kari said, clipping her words.

“Oh, Jennifer and I are friends, sweetheart. We go back a ways.”

“How far back?”

Joe took another pull of his beer. “Went to high school together.”

“Funny how Jennifer has never mentioned you.”

Jennifer gave Kari a “stop it!” look, but Kari was looking at Joe, not her. She kicked Kari under the table. All that got her was a kick in return.

He shrugged. “You know how high school is. Full of cliques. Jennifer and I ran in ones that didn’t have much overlap.”

“So you aren’t friends!”

“High school was a long time ago, sweetheart. We’re friends now.”

“I don’t hear Jennifer agreeing with you.”

“You don’t hear me disagreeing, either!” Jennifer snapped. Okay, so she wasn’t happy Joe was lying, but Kari was being a bitch.

For a moment, Kari and Joe stared at her. Then Joe smiled. “Ready to let me buy you that beer, darling?”

“I’ve reached my limit for the night,” Jennifer said. She spared Kari a quick, annoyed glance. “I could use a ride home, though.”

Joe’s smile widened. “I can manage that.”

“Jen—”

Jennifer cut Kari off with a glare. “I’ll be fine.” She forced her expression to soften. “Thanks for the celebration. This has been fun, but I’m running on not enough sleep, so I should go.”

“Fine.” Kari looked like she wanted to say more, and Jennifer expected something else. But Kari actually kept her opinion to herself. “Give me a call tomorrow. We’ll catch a movie or something.”

Friend-speak for “let me know he didn’t murder you.” Jennifer could handle that level of meddling. She smiled. “Deal.”

Joe guided her out of the bar, his hand firm at the small of her back. Outside, he said, “I’m sorry to say I didn’t drive here, darling.”

“That’s all right. The walk will do me good.” She pulled away. “Thanks for offering to buy me a beer. Have a good night.”

“Oh, I’ll see you home, darling.”

“You don’t need to.”

He flashed her a half-smile. “It’s a matter of want.”

“Ah. Well, then, I don’t want you to walk me home.”

“Yes you do.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and fell into step beside her. “You even want to invite me in.”

He was partially right. Her cunt wanted him to walk her all the way to her bedroom. Her brain was a little smarter. It just wanted him to walk her to the front door. “Don’t flatter yourself.”

He chuckled. They walked in silence for a bit. Jennifer tried to focus on the lovely evening, the salty breeze coming in off the water, the fact that for once, the street lights didn’t blink out when she approached them. It was hard, though, with Joe striding alongside her. He wasn’t touching her, but he was close enough that she could feel him, and something about the way he smelled—a combination of sharp, pleasant scents that reminded her of a crisp fall evening—tugged at her memory.

“Who are you, really?”

“Don’t believe we went to high school together?”

“Willowbend wasn’t that big.”

“No, I suppose it wasn’t.”

They stopped in front of her apartment. Jennifer’s brain wanted to draw back a step and say goodnight, but her cunt wouldn’t let her move. Joe smirked as if he knew about the epic struggle between her reason and libido. He slid a hand behind her head and pulled her into a slow, demanding kiss.

Jennifer barely managed to hold in her whimper when it ended. Joe didn’t move his hand from the back of her neck. “Going to invite me in?”

“I...” Jennifer swallowed. Her brain wrestled for control. “I shouldn’t.”

He let her go. “Suit yourself. Watch those headaches.”

He sauntered off before Jennifer regained enough of her composure to ask how he knew about her headaches.

Joe’s warning to watch her headaches ended up being a curse. Once the euphoria of completing her dissertation wore off and the reality that she was now an unemployed mathematician set in, her cluster headaches reemerged with a vengeance.

She considered herself lucky if she went a day without one. When a particularly nasty one attacked right as she was walking into a job interview, Jennifer knew she had to go back to the doctor.

“During an interview?” Her doctor made sympathetic noises. “That must have been difficult.”

“I’ve gotten pretty good at not wincing. I was able to explain the bloodshot, watery eye away as allergies.” Jennifer shook her head. “But I can’t keep having these headaches every day. I’ll go crazy.”

“You understand, I can’t prescribe the trial drug.”

“I know.” Jennifer looked down at her feet. Nothing she had tried in the past worked like the trial drug. She’d be first in line when it passed FDA approval. She had just been hoping something new had popped up in the meantime. Silly.

The doctor flipped through her file. “And based on your history, it looks like the other treatments were not much help. However...”

Jennifer looked up. “Yes?”

“You’re scheduled for a follow-up MRI this month. One of the last lingering tests from the trial.”

“Oh.”

“Why don’t we set that up? Depending on the results, we may be able to revisit one of your previous treatments with better results.”

“I don’t understand.”

He showed her the results of her pre-trial MRI and her last MRI. The most recent one had a lot more red and yellow spots, but Jennifer had absolutely no idea what they meant.

“Your brain was displaying some different activity. Nothing to worry about,” he reassured her quickly, “but if it is still displaying the same activity, there is the possibility that a treatment that did not work on you while you were in this state—” he wiggled her pre-trial MRI, “may work on you while you are in a different state.”

That she understood. Sort of. “May. As in may or may not.”

“Medicine is a science, but it is a science of trial and error when it comes to individual people. Everyone is a little different. And now your brain may have changed. It’s nothing to worry about.”

“So you keep saying.” She watched him tuck the scans back in her file.

“Sorry.” He gave her an apologetic smile. “It’s become habit. Most patients get nervous when I start talking about changes in their brains.”

Jennifer smiled weakly as she rose. “Just as long as you keep telling me I don’t have a brain tumor, I think I’ll be okay. Should I call to schedule the MRI?”

“Yes.”

Again, Kari accompanied Jennifer to the hospital for her MRI. The MRI itself wasn’t so bad—she actually fell asleep this time—but the conversation with the doctor afterwards didn’t make her feel any better.

Even though he was quick to reassure her she still had no reason to worry. “Not a tumor in sight,” he said.

Jennifer thought the scan looked exactly like her last one. So did her doctor, apparently, or similar enough that he asked if it was all right to send it to his colleague at Washington University.

“What did your colleague say about the last one?”

“Mostly, that it was fascinating. It wasn’t something we expected to see.”

“And you’re still seeing it?”

“Yes. There seems to be very little change from your last MRI.”

“So the drug changed my brain?”

Her doctor’s expression closed in on itself. “I can’t say for sure. It could be the drug, or it could be a natural development of your brain.”

“But if you had to guess?”

“As I said, I can’t say for sure.”

Doctor-speak for “no way in hell am I inviting a malpractice lawsuit by saying what I think.” Jennifer gave him a false smile and rose. “Thank you, doctor.”

“Wait! What about—”

“I’ll be in touch about my treatment options. Right now, I’d like some time to think.”

“I see.” He looked annoyed.

Jennifer hurried out and found Kari nursing a mug of cold coffee in the cafeteria. “No Jell-O today?”

“They only have red. It looks too gross even for me.”

Jennifer cocked her head to one side. Kari seemed a little off. Subdued. “Everything okay?”

That made Kari smile. “You’re the one who came in for a test, and you’re asking me if everything’s okay. Go me.”

“Well, my doctor assured me I have nothing to worry about, so we can talk about you.”

Kari shook her head. “Nah. I’m fine. Let’s go get a real cup of coffee.”

“Deal.”

Kari drove them to the Freight House Coffee on Seventh and Proctor. They settled down at one of the tables outside to soak in some sun.

“So, that Joe,” Kari started, her tone cautious. “Are you a couple?”

“What?” Jennifer laughed. “No. I haven’t even seen him since that little celebratory night at E-9.”

“Really?”

“Why would I lie?”

“You lied about him going to high school with you.”

“What?”

Kari sighed. “I checked him out, okay? And it was really hard, because digging up information on ‘Joe’ who may possibly be from Kansas isn’t much of a starting point.”

Jennifer blinked at her. “You checked him out?”

“Your high school was small. Twenty-three in your graduating class. No Joe’s or Joseph’s or other similar names. Not in your class, not in any class within four years of yours.”

The world seemed to shrink down to them. No cars zooming by on Proctor, no sun, no joggers with their dogs. Just Kari and her and the coffee slowly burning her through the cup’s little cardboard sleeve. “How...where did you...how could you do that?”

Kari gave her a weak smile. “Amazing what you can do online.”

Jennifer stared at her in shock. “You checked him out.”

“There’s more.”

“He’s an axe murderer?”

Kari shrugged. “Maybe. So I got nowhere with the high school search. Well, nowhere except learning that he lied. So I followed him and got his license plate number.”

“Kari, you’re an engineer, not Jim Rockford!”

“Aren’t we a little young to crack Rockford jokes?”

“Rockford’s a classic. And you’re not changing the subject.”

“You’re right. So I got his license plate number, and then I asked my aunt if she could pretty please run it through the DMV computers.”

“I hope she told you no. She could get fired for that.”

“Yeah, well, she likes me. And really, what’s the point of working at the DMV if you don’t use the computer system every once and awhile for personal gain? It’s kind of like working at the phone company.”

“Okay. Reason number two hundred and twenty why I’m glad you don’t work for a utility. Or the DMV. Or the IRS.”

Kari’s weak smile returned. “Yeah. I’d make a good Rockford.”

“Subject.”

“Right. So his car is registered to a Joe Figuraicon. According to the DMV, he just popped up here a few months ago.” Kari looked away and took a long sip of her coffee. “A few months as in right before that first time we saw him at E-9. You remember, don’t you?”

Oh, yes. She remembered that kiss. “Yes.”

“Yeah, so. I can’t figure out where he came from.” Kari looked at her again. “I mean, okay, you’re right. I’m an engineer, not a detective, but my dad’s a public defender. I used to work in his office back in college. I know how to find people. This Joe? It looks like he just poofed into existence. People who poof like that are always bad news. Always.”

“Okay. I hear you. Poof is bad.” Jennifer closed her eyes. When she opened them, the world wasn’t so small, and she could look past Kari to a mother pushing a twin baby stroller across the street. “I just...why would you do that?”

Kari began picking at her cup’s cardboard sleeve, tearing it in a thin spiral. “I was worried. You’re...well, I thought he might be like Tom.”

“He’s not.”

Kari shrugged.

“And I don’t think he’s worse. I mean, poofing aside, when I told him to back off, he did.”

Kari arched an eyebrow. “Oh?”

“Sometimes, I can look after myself.”

Kari smiled, and all of the tension, concern, and worry flew off her face. Jennifer bit down on her annoyance. Kari meddled, yes, but she did it out of friendship. Jennifer knew she should be grateful, but the way Kari treated her sometimes, like she was incapable of learning from her experiences, grated.

She stood and offered Kari a weak smile of her own. “You know, it’s a nice day, and we’re just far enough away from my apartment that I can count the walk as exercise. I’ll give you a call later, okay?”

Kari’s face fell a little. “Yeah. Okay. You’re not mad?”

“A little, but by the time I get home, I won’t be. You know what I’m like, and I know what you’re like.”

“Yeah.” Kari’s smile returned. “Have a good walk.”

She lied. If anything, the walk home made Jennifer more upset with Kari. Who did she think she was? Okay, Jennifer could admit she made stupid choices when it came to men. And she could admit her kinks were not the safest to indulge in given her stupid choices. And she could admit Kari’s support had made it easier to extract herself from Tom, and before him, Michael.

But between Michael and Tom, there had been Lee Fink, a perfectly nice, perfectly sweet, perfectly boring boy. He hadn’t been a mistake like Tom, but Kari never gave her credit for him.

Probably because she had dumped him. Lee was too sweet. He never stopped being a considerate gentleman. Never. Sex with him was...well, he was good, just not the way Jennifer liked. And when she broached the subject with him, the look of horror on his face had told her everything she needed to know.

Her growing anger had Jennifer so wrapped up in herself that she didn’t notice Joe fall into step beside her, not until he said, “Thinking heavy thoughts, darling?”

She startled with a yelp. Joe laughed. “You were lost in your own little world. I’ve been walking with you for two blocks.”

“Liar.”

“God’s honest truth, darling.”

“Feel like continuing that trend?”

He raised his eyebrows.

“Who are you? Really?”

“Didn’t we have this conversation?”

“You never answered.”

He leaned back against one of the large oak trees planted in the public area between the sidewalks and the street. “Figured you knew.”

“Well, I don’t. You’ll have to enlighten me.”

“How are those headaches, darling?”

“Don’t change the subject, cupcake.”

“Cupcake. Nice.” He toed the sidewalk where the oak’s roots were causing the concrete to buckle. “Come closer. I’ll whisper the answer in your ear.”

“Fuck you.” She turned and started walking again.

“That an invitation?” He trailed along behind her.

“No.”

“Now who’s the liar?”

She growled. Fucking poofing trouble-boy. She never should have let him kiss her outside E-9. Or her apartment. Or let him fuck her that one night.

Her body chose that moment to remember that wonderful fuck. For a moment, lust completely overruled rational thought, and she nearly turned around to tell him, yeah, it was an invitation. Did he want her here on the sidewalk? Or maybe against one of the oak trees. Wouldn’t that be a nice sight for the bored neighborhood housewives?

When she spoke, her mouth was dry. “How long have you been in Washington?”

“A few months.”

“And before that?” She stopped at the crosswalk and waited for the light.

He pressed up against her back and slipped his fingers through her belt loops. “Before that, I was mostly in your head,” he whispered, his lips tickling her left ear.

Her heart froze for a moment. “That’s crazy.”

“Is it?” The light changed, and he released her, though he slid one hand along her waist and let it come to rest at the small of her back. “I wasn’t lying when I said we go way back.”

“You’re crazy.”

“No, darling, just very aware of my origins.”

She could stomp on his foot and run like hell. Better yet, she could try to kick out his knee and run like hell. Even if she didn’t dislocate it, the kick would slow him down.

“A little, but do you really want to piss of a crazy man who knows where you live?”

She gasped. “How?”

“There’s still a bit of me in your head, darling.”

“You’re nuts. I can take you to Western. They have a nice ward for people like you.”

He laughed. “They’d have to lock you up, too. Maybe your doctor and his colleague from Washington University will come in to poke at your brain.” A little electricity here,” he tapped her behind the ear, “and will the childhood monster from under your bed pop into existence?”

Jennifer pulled away. “Shut up.” There was no way he could know about her doctor, his colleague, any of it. Not unless he broke into the hospital and read her record. Or unless he was right about being in her head, but that was crazy. Really, really crazy.

Something stirred between her right eye, but it wasn’t pain. She pressed her palm against her eye anyway. “Go away!”

“Too late for that.” He studied her a moment, looking thoughtful. “Well, no, I guess it’s not. I think I can walk away. Get you mad enough, and you’d let me. At least this version of me.”

“You—”

“Yes, darling, I really am crazy. You’ve said that.” He gave her jagged grin. “But I think I’m in a position to let you decide if you want to keep me or let me leave. Looks like we both have things to think about.” He gave her a mocking bow. “I’ll be in touch.”

Jennifer wanted to say she almost forgot about Joe, but she didn’t. Not really. She got so busy, she forgot to think about him, but at night, in her dreams, he was a very welcome presence. First because the dreams distracted her from her dwindling savings account as she struggled to find a job, and then because they provided excellent stress-relief when she finally started work.

Not that her work was all that stressful. Considering her desperation, she found her job incredibly sexy. She had always loved statistical analysis. There was something fascinating about making sense of a mess of data.

And her coworkers weren’t that bad. Really geeky, but she was used to that. Not every brilliant person was as good with people as Kari. Well, as social as Kari. Jennifer was still a little upset with her, so claiming Kari was “good with people” was a bit of a stretch.

Jennifer was also upset with herself. She wanted to like Joe. As the weeks passed, she could conveniently forget how crazy he was, how terrified he could make her feel, and mostly remembered the lust.

Besides, when she thought back over everything he said, it kind of made sense. Oh, it was crazy, and she remembered how scared she had been. But it also seemed to fit. Sort of. Joe had known what she was thinking. The drug trial had done something to her brain. Maybe he wasn’t lying.

If he wasn’t, and he was what he said he was, then she was safe with him. Probably. Her own perfect fantasy wouldn’t hurt her. Hadn’t he said she wanted a partner who understood her kinks and her desire to act normal around her friends? Hadn’t he said he’d take care of her?

Kari, she knew, would say it was crazy. She’d remind Jennifer this was how she got in trouble. So she never let Kari remind her. When they met, they always avoided the topic of men, which was fine with Jennifer.

And when they saw Joe leaning against Jennifer’s front door one night after they’d been out dancing, Jennifer didn’t let her start. “It’s all right,” she said as she got out of Kari’s car. “He and I need to talk.”

Kari pursed her lips. “Just talk?”

Jennifer took a deep breath. “Maybe more if the conversation goes well.”

Kari glared at her.

“He’s not like Tom. If we...well, if it comes up, I’d like you to kind of start over. Just take him at face value.”

“And if he still gives me a bad vibe?”

Jennifer shrugged. “I don’t know.”

Kari sighed. “Just be careful.”

“I will. Goodnight.” She shut the car door and straightened up to watch Kari drive off. Joe was still leaning against her apartment door when she turned around.

“I’m amazed one of my neighbors didn’t call the cops.”

He gave her a cocky half-smile and moved aside so she could unlock the door. “Says who I didn’t charm the pants off your neighbor and the cops?”

“Says you if you want to charm the pants off me.”

“Cute, darling. You’ve changed.”

She tossed her keys on the table by the door and turned on the living room light. “I’m not quite so weak.”

He looked her over. “No. Not quite.” His cocky half-smile returned. “I’m still good for you.”

She took a shaky breath. “What have I been dreaming about lately?”

“I don’t know.” He settled down on her couch. “Five weeks ago, you were dreaming about me bending you over the hood of your friend’s car. Hood still warm, friend still inside, watching us wide-eyed.”

Jennifer blushed. Yeah. She had had that dream. And she had woken up needing more. Wait. Five weeks ago? She sucked in a quick breath. Her last cluster headache had been five weeks ago.

She stepped forward, coming around the coffee table to stand in front of him. “What am I thinking now?”

He studied her a moment. “I don’t know, but if it involves kicking me in the knees, I’m gone.”

She smiled.

“No groin shots, either.”

“You don’t look quite so confident now.” She knelt in front of him.

“Like I said, darling, you’ve changed.”

“For the better.”

“Maybe,” he said as she planted her hands on his knees and scooted between his legs. He watched her through half-lidded eyes. “What are you thinking?”

“That I’ve never given you a proper blowjob.”

His lips twitched in a ghost of a smile. “Not outside your dreams, anyway.”

She unfastened his jeans. “I still think you’re a little crazy.”

He lifted his hips so she could slide off his jeans and boxers. “At the moment, I think you’re a little scary, darling.”

“Guess that evens out the power balance.” She ran her hands up his thighs. He was already half hard. She stroked him, then leaned down to lick up his shaft and around the head of his cock.

He grabbed a handful of her hair when she sucked him in. She took him as deep as she could, listening to his sharp gasps and needy noises. She choked once, twice, then finally got the angle right to take him really deep.

“Fuck!” His hands tightened in her hair. He bucked his hips, and then he pulled her off him. He forced her up until they were nearly level.

His breathing was as ragged as hers. He pinned her between his legs and bit at her neck. “You like the way I taste?”

“Yes.”

He kept his hand twined in her hair and picked at the buttons of her blouse with his free hand. “Get up here, darling,” he said as he licked and nipped his way down to her breasts. I want you riding me.”

Jennifer slid off her panties and straddled him. She slid along him, moaning at the feel of him. He shoved her skirt up and got his hands around her waist.

“Come on. Take me in.” He thrust up into her.

For an instant, there was the sharp pain of sudden penetration. Then she was sliding down his cock in just the right way. She tilted her hips forward and arched her back. Yes, just like that.

He sucked in one of her nipples, swirling his tongue around it. It sent a wet jolt straight to her cunt. She tightened her thighs and rode him harder.

“That’s it,” he said, grabbing her ass and pulling her closer. “Like that.”

“Yes.” Oh, God, yes! It had been too long.

Her orgasm came hard and sudden. She clutched at his shoulders and rode him through it, head tossed back, cunt clenching tight around him.

He groaned. “Fuck! Just like that.”

She kept riding him, fighting her muscles’ desire to slump against him. He gave one final deep thrust and came. Then he went limp and pulled her against his chest. She panted against his neck, enjoying the loose, jittery feeling spreading through her.

He stroked her hair. “I think you’re worth keeping, darling.”

She sniffed. “So certain I’ll feel the same?”

“Yes.”

“You’re still crazy.”

She’d be stupid to let him go and stupid to let him stay. But if she let him stay, and it ended up being a mistake, she could always make him leave. If she let him go, she’d always wonder.

She hated wondering. It always got her in trouble, but she had to know. Jennifer settled more comfortably against him and kissed the base of his shoulder. So she’d get herself in trouble again. Maybe this time, it would be the right kind.