My New Life With Eric
part three
When I came home I immediately put the content of the little box in their right places, the fridge and the cupboard that I had emptied during the day. It was a good thing that I emptied it even though at the time I didn’t really know why. All the little glass bottles in the door of the fridge and the medical supplies in the cupboard. It was time for a shake and a meal. Those massages were great but they did prevent me from getting a meal at the right time. Then again, if it had been bad from me to skip a meal I bet Eric wouldn’t have let me.
Out of habit I walked to the window to draw the curtains but when I had them in my hand I thought it was a ridiculous idea to have them closed. What was there to hide? So I left them the way they were. I didn’t mind if people could look into the house from the building across the street. It wasn’t as if I was parading in the house scantily dressed. Or naked even. Nope, there was nothing to hide.
I was so relieved that Eric understood my feelings about the stuttering. I was glad that I could talk to him about things like that and his explanation seemed perfectly logical to me. Of course I needed him to guide me. I was lost without him in public situations. I mean, there were so many things that could go wrong it was perfectly natural for a boy like me to be nervous. Out there all by himself, all these grown ups. A little stuttering was perfectly all right. I was really happy to have Eric as a friend. Good thing too that he knew about all these complicated things. I had a faint feeling there was something else I talked to Eric about, but I couldn’t remember what it was. At the time it seemed very important but now it was as if it had never existed. Ah well, I would just go to bed so I could have the rest I needed.
I bed I was wearing my briefs but I thought it might be a sexy feeling to be naked in bed. That way I could feel that large dick move about freely when I moved my body or my legs. When I thought of that I took of my briefs and immediately felt horny. Boy did I want to shoot a nice load like I had with Eric. I took a magazine from a drawer beside my bed; it had pictures of huge guys that got me hard the moment I looked at them. Tonight was different though, no matter which picture I looked at I didn’t get hard. I wanted to touch the dick to help out a bit, but I knew I wasn’t allowed. Boy was this frustrating. Such a shame not being able to use this dick what it was obviously made for. Then again, I was happy that I was allowed to have such a grown up dick. I knew other boys would be extremely jealous. I was almost looking forward to be able to show the dick to other guys in the shower at the gym.
Again I found it very difficult to fall asleep. It was as if the bed just wasn’t comfortable for some reason. This wasn’t doing any good to the growth cycle of my muscles, now was it? Before long it was time for my nightly meal again. I had set the alarm clock to make sure I got up in time but again it wasn’t necessary. After my meal I managed to fall asleep in the end.
It felt great to be so full of energy after waking up; despite the difficulty I had falling asleep. After my shower I shaved my face and my body. It wasn’t really necessary but I wanted to make absolutely sure there was no stubble anywhere. The only place on my body with hair, except my head, was the man flesh between my legs. It made sense because a boy doesn’t have hair, but a grown up has. This dick was definitely the dick of a grown up, so it had to have hair.
After my shake and my meal I opened the door of the fridge and instinctively grabbed one of the little bottles in the door. I had a vague memory of doing the same thing yesterday but that day there had been nothing there. Strange. Opened the cupboard with the medical supplies and prepared for my injection. Sterilised a patch of skin, drew some liquid from the little bottle into the syringe and made sure there wasn’t any air in the syringe. Darted the hypodermic needle through the skin on one of my ass cheeks and checked to see if I inadvertently had hit a vein. I hadn’t so I slowly emptied the content of the syringe into my muscle. Put the needle in its cover and disposed of the syringe and the needle by putting them in a special container I kept in the same cupboard. I never really liked needles but it just has to be done. No way I could get as huge as Eric wanted without a little help from the pharmaceutical companies. Certainly not within my lifetime. Isn’t Eric just too sweet? He makes sure I got everything I need.
For some reason my clothes felt too confining. Not that they were tight in any way but there was something else. I couldn’t put my finger on it. So I just let it go. I grabbed my ASP book from my desk and started to read where I had left off. Why was I reading this again? For work I remember. I had taken some time off from work to relax a bit from my stressful job as Account Manager in the Internet business. I knew I had deserved it. I’d been working 80 to 90 hour weeks for months now. Even though I had only been home for two weeks the workplace seemed a completely different universe. But that didn’t matter. I wanted to know more about this ASP technique so I could communicate more easily with the programmers when they encountered some kind of a problem. I was successful and wanted to be even more so. Little did I know that Eric had completely different plans for me. After reading two chapters I couldn’t concentrate on that dry stuff any longer. So instead I surfed the web for articles on bodybuilding. That way I could improve my workout routine and get some results. That seemed to make more sense than reading up on that ASP stuff.
All that reading made me want to work out even more. Time for a meal and a shake. I began to realise that this eating business was taking up a large part of my day. Not just preparing the meals but eating them too took a lot of time. I always felt a bit sleepy after a meal so I took a nap on the sofa. I woke up from the sound of my mobile. It was a friend of mine, John; he asked if I would like to have diner in town with him tonight. I told him that would be nice. I hadn’t seen him in a while because of the demands from work. So it would be nice to catch up with him.
When I arrived at the restaurant John was already sitting at a nice table by the window. I waved at him while the waiter took my coat. “Hey J-j-ohn, how are you?” I said. He told me he was just fine and asked me if I liked the days off so far. “W-w-ell, it’s been really n-n-ice to get some rest from w-w-ork. I know I’ve been w-w-orking w-w-ay to hard lately.” John looked at me as if I was pulling his leg or something. “W-hat!?” I asked him. “Well,” he said, “you never used to s-s-tutter, for one. And what’s happened to your arms? Looks like you’ve been shaving them or something. What’s up with you?” “W-hat’s up with m-me? You’re the o-o-ne who started all this. I’m j-j-ust fine, I like s-s-having my body and don’t you t-t-hink it’s a little too easy to m-m-ake fun of someone who s-s-tutters?” What was John’s problem anyway? We’ve always been good friends and now he starts bitching me about my stuttering, as if I can help that, and what about me shaving my body, isn’t that my business? I wished Eric were here. He would know what to say. After a little while John accepted the fact that I stuttered, I think he blamed it on me working way too hard for so long. On the topic of shaving my body he said: “Christ only knows why you’d want to do a thing like that”, but if I wanted to do that, “Fine with me.” We did have a nice meal. He asked why I kept talking about the nutritional values of everything that we were eating. All he could talk about was his girlfriend. Though I really like her it didn’t interest me too much. He, on the other hand wasn’t too interested in my workout routine. We did find some common ground on the subject of motorbikes. “I didn’t know you were interested in motorbikes?” John said. I told him that I was actually thinking of getting my motor licence so I could buy a nice Kawa or Honda race monster. “Perhaps we could go for lessons together,” he said. I told him that I liked the idea. Only problem was that he couldn’t start ‘till after his current project was finished. That would take two months. “T-t-wo months?!” I said, “That’s j-j-ust too long for m-m-me. I want to s-s-tart next week.”
It was nice to see John again, but in the end it was a bit of a disappointment. We used to be totally tuned in together, share the same interests and enjoy the same kind of humour. Even shop talk was great with John. We could share battle-stories about various projects, bitch about clients and other work related stuff. Him being straight and me being gay had never been an issue. I couldn’t believe that we had grown away from each other in only two months or something. What had happened to him?
Again I didn’t sleep ‘till a long time after my nightly meal. This would have to come to an end. How am I supposed to get any sleep this way? Eric would know what to do about it. He knew so much more than me. It was good to have a friend like him.
After my newly adapted daily ritual of shaving, shakes, needles and breakfast. I got ready to go to the gym for a nice back routine. I had been looking at good routines on the net. I had never before realized that bodybuilding requires so much dedication and knowledge too. All that stuff you have to know about proper form, the right kind of food at the right time, the supplements and the stuff about the needles. There was so much to know, to learn. It all seemed very grown up to me but for some reason I was taking all this information in like a sponge. Not knowing that it was actually replacing all the knowledge of the internet business I had build up over the years.
On my way to the gym I passed a driving school and decided to step inside to ask when I could start my motor lessons. While I was waiting I could see some guys in the back getting into full leather racing suits. “Must be the instructors,” I thought. Wouldn’t it just be great if I could wear a suit like that one day? Drive my own racer wearing a colour coordinated one-piece leather racing suit. I had always wanted to have my motor licence and now I was going to get it! I could take Eric on the back and drive to the beach. It’d be so cool to show off that bike and my body. I could walk the boulevard with the top part zipped open and hanging from my waist, just wearing a white wife beater. It would show my muscle. I just got a naughty idea about perhaps getting a large tribal tattoo. Eric would be walking next to me so I wouldn’t panic with all those grown ups around. Wouldn’t that just be fantastic? All leathered up muscle hunk sporting this large tattoo parading along the boulevard. I just loved the mental image that was forming in my mind. Little did I know that it wasn’t me, but Eric who was forming that mental picture in my head.
I really loved my workout. I did miss Eric’s company. But somehow it was as if his encouraging words from the other work out were there every time when I needed them. Always making sure that I pushed that bar up one more time, making sure that I did that one extra rep. My workouts had never before been better. The ritual in the mornings before breakfast made my muscle feel as if they were exploding with energy that needed to be transformed in more muscle fibre. That feeling was so erotic. I could almost feel my muscles grow.
I had worked up quite a sweat and was happy to take a shower. I undressed slowly in front of the mirror. I really liked what I saw. And I knew I would like what I saw even better in a few months when the pharmaceuticals and my workouts had done their combined work. I would be one big chunk of muscle. For now I just enjoyed what was already there. One of those things was the dick between my legs. What a sight. I still loved to look at it. I really would love to touch it but somehow I never did. As if I wasn’t allowed or something. I had touched it once, accidentally, and it had felt as if I was touching someone else’s dick. I walked to the shower to show my man flesh to who ever were already in there. I could feel it sway; touch my left leg, my right leg and then my left leg again. It felt so erotic, I could hardly believe I had a grown up dick between my boy legs.
I hoped there would be some other boys in the shower, man would they be jealous. Unfortunately were just grown ups in the shower. Didn’t matter, they would be whishing they had had such a dick when they had been boys. I started using my sponge to lather up my body in such a way that everybody was sure to be at least looking occasionally. And look they did. When I got to the dick I took extra special care, this was special meat. The men in the shower were sure looking at my crotch. But the look on their faces wasn’t that of jealousy at all. They looked more as if they wondered what all the fuss was about. As if the dick I was cleaning wasn’t anything special at all. I had long since checked out their dicks. They may all be grown ups but their dicks weren’t at all as big as the one between my legs. I couldn’t have begun to grasp the fact that the size, the behaviour and the feeling of the dick were all in my mind. And my mind alone. They wasn’t anything special between my legs, just the fairly small dick that had always been there. That was the dick those guys were seeing. Not me, all I could feel and see was the magnificent dick that Eric had given me for being a good boy.
When I was sipping Eric’s special tea again sitting on his sofa, I told him how excited I was that I could start my motor driving lessons in three days. “I’m so pleased for you” he said, “I know you’ve always wanted that.” “I sure have,” I told him. When I told him about the strange, unexpected, looks from those grown ups in the shower when I was showing my body and the dick, Eric told me that they didn’t look surprised but looked more like they were telling my off. “A boy with such a grown up dick between his legs, that can’t be good.” That was probably what they were thinking he told me. I couldn’t but agree with him, of course. I was smiling again. “You shouldn’t worry so much little man, you know that I take care of you don’t you? There is absolutely no need for you to worry; you will have enough worries when you’re all grown up. Just enjoy this carefree period while you can, you’ll be a real man before you know it.” Immediately I felt all the weight I had been carrying on my shoulders for years fall from my shoulders. He was right, boys didn’t need to worry about things, worrying was for grown ups.
I really don’t know how Eric could have known; perhaps I had black circles around my eyes or something. He asked me if I had been sleeping well the past few days. I told him that no matter how I tried I couldn’t get comfortable in my bed. That had never been a problem before. “Oh, my little guy” he said with a wide grin as if to say that of course I didn’t know because I was too young to know, “of course you your bed isn’t comfortable. It’s way too soft; it’s not good for you; that’s why your body is protesting by feeling uncomfortable. If you can’t sleep again tonight, perhaps you should try sleeping on the floor. And when you do don’t use a pillow and only use one sheet of bed linen. You’ll see that you’ll find that so much more comfortable. You’ll sleep like a rose. I promise.” I would never have thought of that myself. I thanked Eric for his advice, he was so knowledgeable.
The special massage was extra good today because my back and shoulders felt so much more relaxed now all my worries had been lifted from my mind. On my way home I felt really rejuvenated, as if I was 11 or 14 again. I was in really high spirits. I never knew there was a world out there without any worries or problems. In my line of work there were always worries and problems from clients and the guys at work not doing what they were supposed to do. The more I thought about it the more it felt like someone else’s job. But I knew I had to return to the office in a while. But I didn’t worry about it, Eric had told me that worrying was for grown ups.
After my meal and shake I cleaned up my apartment. Not that there was a lot to do because I had been keeping my house so clean and tidy. I did wonder why in heavens name I had so much stuff. What was the use of all that? “Do you really need all that stuff? Why not throw the stuff that you don’t need away?” It was the voice in that place deep inside my head that was saying things like that. It was a voice that I had gotten used to. It was my friend, it reminded me of Eric. It sounded like his comforting whispers. The voice gave me advice just when I needed it. It was the same voice that encouraged me in the gym, the voice that made sure I got the injections right, the voice that knew when to eat, the voice that.... that.... controlled my life. “Yes” I thought, the place looks like a shop. All that stuff. I found a bag and started to thrown in all the decorative stuff. Why would you want to decorate anyway? Decorating only meant more work dusting the place and spending money on useless stuff. My living room looked as if I had just moved in after I was done. Three big garbage bags in total, photo frames, nick knacks, plants, all kinds of stuff. I had almost thrown in my cd’s, videos and DVDs but I thought that might be too much of a waste. I could sell them to a second-hand shop, they would probably love to get my stereo and TV and stuff.
After I had worked up a sweat again, I did most of the work just wearing a new tight blue string bikini that I just HAD to buy when I saw it. The contours of that magnificent meat between my legs were so clearly visible. I noticed that some people in the apartment across the street thought I part of was some kind of show as they were just standing at their windows watching me for a while. I really didn’t care to close the curtains. If they wanted to see a hot body why would I deny them that pleasure? That reminded me, I got an other bag and chucked in the curtains. Never had any need for them.
After my shake I set the alarm clock for my midnight meal and pulled the covers over me. I was kinda tired. That great work out and getting rid of all that stuff, carrying those bags down the stairs to the basement and throw them in the large waste container was all a bit much. When it was time for my meal I hadn’t been able to sleep for two minutes in a row. While preparing the protein shake at 02.30 AM I was thinking why I couldn’t sleep again. When I felt the voice beginning to form a sentence I remembered what Eric told me. Again it made so much sense to me. The frigging bed is just to soft, why use a mattress, or indeed a bed? I gulped down the banana-flavoured shake. I really hated bananas before, but I just loved these shakes.
Back in the bedroom I took a single sheet of bed linen and lied down on the ground. At first I thought it was weird or it would feel really uncomfortable to be on sleeping on the floor naked, but I was pleasantly surprised to find that the floor was indeed much more comfortable than the bed had ever been. I had such sweet dreams about Eric and me walking on the boulevard on our way to our favourite beach hang out. I couldn’t wait till I had passed my driving tests.